Rise of the casual f-bomb
Young people who grew up hearing it in movies, music and online take it to the office
There’s a reason we call it the “f-bomb.” Like a bomb, the particular profanity beginning with “f” can be a powerful weapon. Yet in offices, hallways, conference rooms and cubicles, people are dropping the f-word into daily banter with no more ill will than if they were lobbing a pencil.
Mostly, this is driven by young people who’ve grown up hearing it in movies, music and cable TV and reading it on social media. They don’t consider it a BFD to say it, and are surprised when others do.
“We are in a time of flux,” said Benjamin Bergen, author of What The F: What Swearing Reveals About Our Language, Our Brains, and Ourselves. Language is always evolving, which often causes tension, but Bergen said we may be in the midst of the biggest generation gap ever.
“A few centuries ago, a student’s ‘zounds’ or ‘gadzooks’ would turn an English teacher’s face purple,” he said. In 1972, heads spun when comedian George Carlin famously named “Seven Words You Can Never Say on Television” — which technically still is true, at least for broadcast TV.
But TVs today are mere appliances to digital natives, outpaced by a new world of screens on computers, phones and pads funneling content for which we, as subscribing viewers, are our own censors.
Bergen describes a 20-year-old waking up to check her Twitter feed, who “can see ‘the f-bomb’ a hundred times before breakfast.” So when she arrives at work and wonders aloud with profane curiosity who emptied the coffeepot without starting another, she believes she’s simply expressing her dismay.
Some co-workers might not miss a beat, might even laugh. But such language can become a problem if someone — likely older, but not always — overhears and takes offence. (A distinction: We’re not talking about using the word to berate or intimidate others, but as an energetic adjective to elevate a strong emotion, even express enthusiasm.)
Karen Gureghian is a human resources consultant with HR Business Partners in Minneapolis. Her work often takes her into offices where she has to sit in common spaces and so hears the ebb and flow of conversation.
Sometimes, she said, two people use similar language and neither one is offended, “and that’s OK. But if you’re in a hallway and people overhear you and they’re offended, that could contribute to a hostile work environment.”
Dropping an f-bomb “isn’t illegal, so to speak,” she added. “But sometimes, it’s pretty bad. I’m not offended, but after a while, it can get kind of off-putting and makes me wonder about that person and their judgment.
“Are they getting their point across, or have they misread the room?”
Workplaces are creatures of tradition, management and stereotype. Language is influenced by age, class, environment and culture. Little wonder, then, that expectations can clash — sometimes unexpectedly.
One millennial who responded to a Facebook query about workplace profanity said he and his friends feel like they’re navigating a world where they’re the pottymouths, so strive to dial it back. Yet as a white-collar engineer who inspects power plants, he encounters rampant profanity among some older, blue-collar employees.
“I am pretty much expected to reciprocate if I want them to respect me and listen to my recommendations,” he said, preferring to remain nameless because he was describing clients. “It can be a struggle with being taken seriously versus being professional, but you learn the proper balance over time.”
While their profanity might surprise him, it doesn’t offend him. What does, he said, is a casual use of “homophobic/racist/ misogynist language.”
Bergen said that jibes with several recent studies in which people were asked to rate vulgar words from most offensive to least offensive.
In one, where college students rated 92 words considered taboo, a word that also means manure came in 49th. The f-bomb rated no higher than 13.
Among the dirtier dozen were words with sexual or religious roots. “But the words they considered most offensive were slurs,” Bergen said — terms that denigrate people based upon skin colour, religion, sexual orientation, physical or mental abilities.
In a way, Bergen said, this is good news: While young people may find the f-word no big deal, they are offended by slurs that target and are specifically meant to hurt people.
A study last year of 1,500 office workers by Wrike, a management software company, found that almost seven in 10 millennials said they swear at work, compared with a little more than five out of 10 baby boomers.
About a third of millennials explained that swearing can help strengthen a team, and that can reflect enthusiasm for their work. In their view, an f-bomb is just an adjective, used without overthinking it too much.
Yet at times, Bergen said, a little overthinking wouldn’t hurt.
“If you’ve judged your audience right and they, too, think this is an informal context, then they will judge you to be funnier, more honest, more accessible, more casual,” he said.
“But if you’ve miscalibrated, and they don’t like you, then profanity will make you seem unhinged, out of control, irrational, undisciplined.”
Three in four millennial moms admit to swearing in front of their kids, according to a survey of 1,000 millennial parents by Kraft, makers of the modern mother’s little helper, boxed mac and cheese.
Kraft made a Mother’s Day video on YouTube about alternative swearwords that parents can use around their little ones. Host Melissa Mohr, an English professor who wrote Holy Sh*t: A Brief History of Swearing, suggested saying: “What the frog?” or “Get your shiittake mushrooms ready for soccer practice.”
Laurie Bennett, responding to the Facebook query, said this: “I think social media has actually cleaned up my language in real life. I find so many posts offensive, it drives me in the other direction.”