AN URGENT NEED FOR FOSTER HOMES
The number of homes offering care has decreased each year, in part due to high housing and living expenses
Angela Hatch’s View Royal townhouse has plush carpet for quiet steps, soft-lit tidy rooms and a fridge full of colour-co-ordinated milk bottles. “My home has a very good routine that I stick to closely,” said Hatch, a retired nurse who has been a foster parent for 31 years and cared for more than 140 children.
On every surface are photos of babies, toddlers, kids and teens. Hatch has seven grown children and many grandchildren of her own, but most of the kids in the photos are ones she fostered as infants, many of whom were born with addictions or medically fragile.
“The infants that come into my home are prenatally exposed to substances. Opiates are big, heroin and morphine, and some have been exposed to crystal meth and cocaine,” she said. Some are born prematurely and have withdrawal symptoms, seizures and heart problems.
Hatch is one of the Ministry of Children and Family Development’s go-to foster parents for some of the most vulnerable infants in the Safe Babies program.
According to the ministry and local agencies, there is an urgent need for more foster homes for babies in the program, and for all children in care on the Island. They range from infants to teens and many have special needs.
“I don’t know if there are more babies right now, but it seems that way. The need for homes is huge,” said Hatch, who also helps parents reconnect with their babies if they’ve been put into care, and trains other foster parents to care for babies exposed to substances.
Taking care of sick babies is not for everyone, said Hatch, who not only has medical training but a passion, and gift, for her work.
“I am fortunate that I manage very well on three hours’ sleep at night,” said Hatch.
She’s also lucky enough to have help from support workers, since she typically has two to three babies at a time.
She has found the babies respond well to a calm environment and being held securely and rocked. “I play calm classical music at night. They like that.” Her phone even plays music when it rings.
Hatch said she became a foster parent after adopting a young girl who was mistreated in care. She could not undo what had been done to her daughter, but she could help others.
“It takes a lot of commitment and being home. This is a lifestyle and you have to put your whole hustle into it,” said Hatch, who is a spry four-foot-10 and in her late 60s.
She said the most important quality for foster parents of babies is to have an open mind and “not to judge the birth parents.” “No young woman wants her baby to be addicted.”
One down side of the job is parting with babies after becoming attached to them, she said, although that’s eased somewhat by the arrival of another baby.
“Every child that comes to our home deserves to attach and bond and I’ve found doing so, they will better attach to their families,” said Hatch, who stays in touch with many of the children as they grow up. “It’s hard. I’m happy for them, but sad for however many months or years they were my baby.”
Safe Babies is just one of several programs on the Island in desperate need of more foster parents, said Dan Malone, executive director of the Foster Parent Support Services Society in Victoria. The society is a nonprofit that provides education and support for foster parents.
“Fostering across the board is in dire need across the Island,” said Malone.
Some of the children needing care are in sibling groups, others have special needs, but all have experienced some trauma, Malone said.
And while the ultimate goal is to eventually return them to their parents if possible, they need supportive relationships and adults to care for them in the meantime.
According to the provincial government, there are 1,681 children and youth in government care on Vancouver Island, which includes those in foster care as well as those living independently, in group homes and in soon-to-be adoptive homes. In the capital region, there are 479, of whom 335 have special needs.
The number of foster homes has decreased each year on the Island. In 2015, there were 668 foster homes on the Island. Today, there are 584.
There are many reasons why that could be the case, Malone said. For starters, housing is expensive and people don’t tend to rent homes with more bedrooms than they need.
Malone said people also tend to work more — as the cost of living rises, fewer parents are staying home.
Mark and Donna Drapeau said they decided to become foster parents about 19 years ago after seeing an ad in the paper and having friends tell them they’d be ideal for the role.
“Mark and I were not fortunate to have our own kids, so now we have this big extended family,” said Donna.
Four teens, ages 13 to 19, are currently staying in the couple’s Saanich home, which has seven bedrooms.
The teens stay anywhere from a few days to a few years. Having a house full of teens for nearly two decades “is never boring,” Donna said. “It can be quite interesting, their views on the world and the way they think creatively.”
When they started fostering, Mark was looking for a career change and had experience in counselling and dealing with substance abuse. The ministry told him that to be a foster parent, he’d also need experience working with children, so he volunteered with the Youth Empowerment Society.
While the Drapeaus have fostered kids of all ages, they find teens work best for them. Donna said she found herself getting attached to younger children and it was hard when they had to leave.
“Part of why we chose teens is there is a natural progression to independence. We’re preparing them and ourselves for them to go out into the world,” she said.
The Drapeaus decided to make fostering their full-time jobs, housing multiple youth, including some with high needs.
Mark said it’s like any job where you work from home and have flexibility, but also more commitments — although respite care is available if you want to take a vacation.
He and Donna said the greatest rewards come in the smallest victories: “Like when they leave and call us to check in, or if they are in trouble and call us to help,” he said.
Donna added: “Some of these kids don’t have a lot of trust, because they’ve been let down by the adults in their lives. … When they turn to us and reach out, or even when an angry kid who won’t talk says ‘thank you’ for the first time, these are the little things. The payback.”
To learn more about foster parenting in Victoria and on the Island, visit the Foster Parent Support Services Society at fpsss.com.