Practice of fasting transcends different faiths
Food abstinence allows for self-reflection, enrichment of soul, practitioners say
For Jewish people, Yom Kippur is the highest holiday, a day in which you atone to God for your sins and atone to the people you’ve hurt
Ramadan is the Muslim month of fasting, when observant Muslims abstain from food and drink between sunrise and sunset. This year, Ramadan falls during the longest days of the year, leaving many hours to think (and not about food).
So instead, I’ve been thinking about the act of fasting itself. Purposely staying away from food and drink for spiritual or ethical reasons is a tradition enthusiastically engaged in by Muslims. But it is also a practice shared by many other faiths.
The great thing about growing up in Toronto is the opportunity to make friends from different cultures and religions. I called upon three friends of different faiths — one Catholic, one Hindu and the other Jewish — to share how they interpret and practise their fasting traditions.
I’ve been friends with all three women for years, but this is the first time I asked about their fasting experience. It was so interesting to discover that we all fast for very similar reasons — family, faith, tradition, food — all the good stuff that makes the act of fasting so great. Catholic Annamaria Aceto is a fellow English teacher, and a good friend. I asked her to educate me about the Catholic tradition of Lent. Annamaria: OK, but it’s been a while since Sunday School. Jesus was in the desert for 40 days on a soul-searching experience.
During this time, he was coming to terms with who he is as the son of God. The devil tempted him many times and he gave up so much. The idea is, as a Catholic you sacrifice something important to you, to honour what he did. Uzma: What have you given up for Lent? Annamaria: Coffee, TV, chips. It’s not just about the sacrifice though. It’s also about trying to do good. For example, if you swear a lot, try not to curse for 40 days. Jesus was grappling with identity issues: does he accept who he is or just run away? You’re trying to improve. Uzma: I think that’s really beautiful. Do you plan to observe Lent with your own children? Annamaria: Definitely. It teaches them sacrifice, empathy, discipline. I could see Lent meaning no screen time, or maybe we volunteer at a food bank. Uzma: Do you find Lent difficult? Annamaria: As an adult, I can see it enriches my spirituality. For children, look at what they’ve accomplished. You learn the discipline, you honour the faith. Uzma: It’s interesting that both religions share the idea of sacrifice as a way to improve. Annamaria: I’m glad this is one thing we can share . . . though you’re way more intense! Uzma: Did I mention we can’t drink water? Hindi Milli Pajpani is a friend by appropriation; I met her through my husband, but now I’ve got dibs. Uzma: Milli, I know Hindus fast several times during the year. Can you tell me about Karva Chauth? Milli: Karva Chauth is a north Indian tradition. Married women fast for the health, prosperity and long life of their husbands. Uzma: Can you walk me through your fast? Milli: Karva Chauth is usually in October or November. The married women in the family eat before sunrise. My mother-in-law cooks for us. Before, my sister-in-law and I would stay up the night before and talk, watch movies and put henna on our hands. It’s different now we have kids. Uzma: Yes, kids ruin everything. What happens next? Milli: In the afternoon we prepare our thalis (plates) for the ceremony at the mandir (temple). We put nuts, fruit, flower petals, diya (candle), sweets and money.
Later, you give the thalis to your mother-in-law. Most women dress up. I always wear my wedding sari and jewelry. To kill time during the day we’ll go see a movie. Uzma: In your wedding sari and jewelry? I love that. Milli: At the mandir we sit down with other women. We pray to the goddess Gauri. We pass around our thalis and sing songs. Everything in Indian culture is song-related. Uzma: That explains Bollywood. Milli: After that, we go home and wait for the moon to rise. Some peo- ple look up the time on the Weather Network. In my house, finding the moon becomes a family mission. My kids will make telescopes out of empty paper-towel rolls. When you see the moon, you go outside with your husband. We’ll say a prayer, and sprinkle blessed water on the ground. My husband will feed me my first bite of food. Uzma: Sounds romantic. Do you plan to pass this on to your kids? Milli: Absolutely. It’s something that ties us to our Indian culture: a bonding moment for the women in the family. Judaism Shirit Oren is family through marriage, and has become a good friend. She lived in Israel as a teenager for a short time. Uzma: Can you tell me a little bit about Yom Kippur? Shirit: Yom Kippur is the highest holiday in the Jewish religion. The eve of Yom Kippur is Erev, when the fast starts. Before sundown, you have the whole family over. My family is Sephardic. We eat potato and beef kebabs, rice, chicken soup. There’s a special prayer and everyone takes a sip of wine out of one cup. After the meal we sit on our porch, tell stories and laugh.
On the day of Yom Kippur, you’re resting, you’re reflecting. When the sun goes down, you get together and say the same prayer and pass around the wine again. Uzma: So is it really a Day of Atonement? Shirit: Yes, you atone to God for the sins you committed that year and you atone to the people that you’ve hurt. The year I lived in Israel, my aunt was dying of cancer. Her exhusband came over to apologize. She forgave him. She didn’t want to die with unfinished business. Uzma: That’s really powerful. Shirit: Another example is my grandmother. She hated our neighbours, but every Yom Kippur she knocked on the door and talked to them. She didn’t actually apologize but she made peace. It’s whatever level of atonement you can handle. Uzma: Did you find fasting hard? Shirit: Yes, it was very hard. By 2 p.m., I really wanted a drink of water. Uzma: Water is the hardest part for me, too. Will you pass on this tradition to your own kids? Shirit: If I was still in Israel I would, but it’s not the same for me here. Yom Kippur falls around Thanksgiving, so I will probably incorporate the two. Now I celebrate Christmas (as well); not for religious purposes, but to get together with family.