These rodents aren’t worth leaving home for
Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Road Chip (out of 4) Starring Jason Lee, Kimberly Williams-Paisley, Justin Long and Bella Thorne. Directed by Walt Becker. 92 minutes. Opens Friday at major theatres. G
The guardians of the Alvin and the Chipmunks galaxy are scraping the bottom of the peanut barrel with flick No. 4: The Road Chip.
Sure they’re cute, but helium-voiced music-making chipmunk brothers, the bratty wiseacre Alvin (Justin Long), nerdy worrywart Simon (Matthew Gray Gubler) and cuddly chubby Theodore (Jesse McCartney) have never been more annoying.
Girl-group ’munks, the Chipettes, are less grating, only because they get less screen time thanks to a stint judging a TV reality show, obvious in its product placement-style mentions.
The chipmunks’ manager/father figure David Seville (Jason Lee) is now busy with non-chipster things, working with singer Ashley (Bella Thorne, without much to do) and dating doctor Samantha (Kimberly Williams-Paisley), who wears her stethoscope everywhere like a bizarre piece of jewelry.
Figuring Dave is about to pop the question on a trip to Miami, the three hit the road on a cross-country quest to put a stop to it. They’re cool with Samantha, but her son Miles (Josh Green) makes Alvin look like an altar boy when it comes to anti-social behaviour.
Hope springs with an entertaining version of “Uptown Funk” as the Chipmunks lead a crew of musicians through New Orleans’ French Quarter. But the glow doesn’t last.
Directed by Walt Becker ( Wild Hogs, Old Dogs) and penned by Adam Sztykiel and Mrs. Doubtfire writer Randi Mayem Singer (who should know better), the dumb jokes, wisecracks and grating Top 40 hits delivered with attempts at urban hipness will keep the average 6-year-old happily entertained, right down to the chipmunk poop.
But The Road Chip can’t even get the tone of a low-aiming slapstick romp right, struggling for relevance by hanging the story on blended families and inserting a soul-searching scene that left the kids in the theatre fidgeting with boredom.
Adults get their lone treat with a fun cameo from John Waters that generously gives Alvin the best line in the movie. But this road trip is not worth leaving home for.