Mother’s dwindling appetite is real concern
Since dad died, my mom looks thinner and drinks tea with muffins all the time. When I tell her she is not eating well, she gets annoyed. What can I do? Hungry for change
Good on you that you are alert and noticing these changes in your mom. A persistent lack of appetite is cause for concern. Take your mom to the doctor for a thorough medical checkup. The doctor will screen for any underlying condition such as depression, medication side effects, stress or even arthritis. All these conditions and many others can potentially affect appetite and meal preparation.
If an underlying medical condition is ruled out, the problem could be that she is now alone and has no one to cook for. Eating is a social activity for most of us. Does mom eat better in your company and in your home? If the answer is yes, this doesn’t mean she needs to eat with you all the time, but it’s a clue that her appetite and enjoyment of food is still there. Encouraging her to join a seniors’ recreational program (where meals are included) can provide her with activity and stimulation as well as improved appetite.
Another possibility is that she is having trouble organizing her grocery shopping, and buys too little or too much food. Shopping for one requires a bit of work to plan meals in a nutritious and cost-effective manner. Of course, living on muffins is simple but not very healthy. Shop with her and help her plan easy, nutritious meals. Split foods that come in big amounts, such as cutting a barbecue chicken in half and freezing the other half. Try repackaging foods into smaller meal-sized portions and put in storage containers in the fridge, ideally with dates, so your mom or you can identify old food that needs to be tossed.
You may also try to introduce your mom to a “Meals on Wheels” program and she can freeze some extra meals. She may also benefit from home-cooked meals if you are making them. Bring over small portions with labels and dates for the fridge. Alternately, if she still likes to cook, encourage her to make a family favourite for you and keep some for herself.
One common mistake families make is sending too much food to mom and this becomes overwhelming.
Remember, “less is more” when mom opens her fridge and has to pick. If your mom is able, have her keep a meal diary for you both to review. She may not be aware of how much her eating has changed since your dad passed away. Small nutritious snacks are a good option, such as party sandwiches, bowls of nuts and dried fruit, cheese and crackers and ready-cut fruit.
There are registered dietitians that can help you plan with your mom. Don’t expect to make big changes overnight to her eating habits. Go slow and steady with mom, and monitor her progress.