Real Housewives of Small-Town England
The Show: Doctor Foster, Season 1, Episode 5 The Moment: The slap Dr. Gemma Foster (Suranne Jones), who’s 37, and her husband Simon (Bertie Carvel), who’s 40, are having dinner at their neighbours,’ the Parks. The Parks don’t know that their 23-year-old daughter Kate (Jodie Comer) is sleeping with Simon. They’re about to find out.
Calmly, eating all the while, Gemma drops bomb after bomb about Kate (who’s seated beside her) and about Simon’s business deal with the Parks. “You’re a bitch,” Kate says.
“Bitch is right,” Gemma replies. “And I’m a wolf tonight.”
Kate stands to leave. Suddenly, she smacks Gemma on the back of the head. “You ancient f---ing cow!” Kate cries.
If this show were a book, this is the moment I’d have thrown it across the room. A few episodes ago, I’d been intrigued. I love Jones ( Scott & Bailey) and to watch her think her way through an emotional thriller? Sign me up.
But soon alarm bells were sounding. Every woman here is treacherous; they’re jealous of Gemma or think she’s a snob, or both. And this is the level of insight into why Simon cheated: “All men want to.”
It was the word “ancient” that did me in, though. It wasn’t the first time Kate called Gemma old, but it was the most ridiculous.
I don’t buy that a 23-year-old who’s sleeping with a 40-year-old would call a 37-year-old — who looks like Jones — a hag. If you’re going to turn a domestic drama into The Real Housewives of Small-Town England, you’ve got to give me something better than that. Doctor Foster is available on Netflix. Johanna Schneller is a media connoisseur who zeroes in on pop-culture moments. She usually appears Monday through Thursday.