Seven braggadocious synonyms for Donald Trump
The nominee’s use of one word during the first debate caused a spike in online searches
Donald Trump can make us do many things.
He has driven us to laugh, to cry, to drink, to sigh, to slap our foreheads, to scream in the shower and to toss and turn while fearing the end of days.
But until the first U.S. presidential debate this week, in which rival Hillary Clinton filleted the carroty tycoon like a largemouth bass, he was not making us lunge for the dictionary. That changed on Monday when Trump took a momentary break from the 90-minute ad he was shooting for Sudafed and casually uttered “braggadocious,” causing a massive spike in online searches.
Merriam-Webster soon informed visitors the term is “a dialectical word from 19th century America, meaning ‘arrogant.’ ”
Other searches still trending by Wednesday, also from the debate, included “stamina” and “temperament.”
Well, for once, Trump has done some good. This is bigly bordering on yuge.
If his supporters are wrist-deep in reference books, this means there is less time to be stocking up on ammo or burning effigies of the sitting president.
With that in mind, and to maintain this positive momentum, here are seven other arcane words Trump Nation should look up on Merriam-Webster and really consider before the election in November.
1. Mountebank (moun·te·bank; noun): A dishonest person.
Usage example: “The movement started to sputter in the home stretch after the glorious leader refused to release his taxes, leading even diehards to wonder what the mountebank was trying to hide inside his Spider Man boxers.” See also: quacksalver, charlatan, spieler, thimblerigger, four-flusher, knave. 2. Iracund (ira·cund; adjective): Easily provoked to anger.
Usage example: “When the iracund mogul was called out for being born with a silver spoon and cheating contractors, rage rolled across his cantankerous face, just as it did earlier in the day when a hummingbird tried to nest in his hair.”
See also: choleric, dyspeptic, bellicose, splenetic, bilious. 3. Nescience (ne·science; noun): Lack of knowledge or awareness.
Usage example: “When the candidate got bored after two minutes and pretended a nearby potted plant was a minority he was about to deport, the foreign policy briefing was suspended as senior officials swallowed hard and feared nescience would be the great undoing of their historic campaign.”
See also: sciolistic, benightedness, stolidness. 4. Bedlamite (bed·lam·ite; noun): Madman, lunatic.
Usage example: “After Santa failed to promptly reply to the letter from his young son, the magnate morphed into a bedlamite and threatened to build a wall around the North Pole and then destroy it with nukes and hardened AlphaGetti.”
See also: crackpot, screwball, injudicious, harum-scarum. 5. Malapert (mal·a·pert; adjective): Impudently bold and insulting.
Usage example: “The pageant overlord toggled between malapert and misogynistic when he called the contestant ‘Miss Piggy’ and then quietly asked a handler, ‘What’s with broads today? Don’t they realize the highest calling is Trophy Wife?’ ”
See also: incondite, hoydenish, contumelious. 6. Facinorous (fa·cin·o·rous; adjective): Atrociously wicked.
Usage example: “Taking credit for charitable donations from others while funnelling donations into private accounts struck veteran observers as facinorous even as they heard rumours the private tanning salon was a sweatshop in which young children spritzed the naked leader with a chemically altered concoction of zinc gel and Orange Crush.”
See also: flagitious, pestiferous, malefic, execrable. 7. Phantasmagoria (phan·tas·ma·go·ria; noun): A confusing or strange scene that is like a dream because it is always changing in an odd way.
Usage example: “Donald Trump’s slapdash bid for the U.S. presidency is an unending phantasmagoria that is eating away at decency, humanity and common sense as he blusters his way across unprecedented vituperation under the cover of platitudes and slogans that can’t mask the sociopathic narcissism that is powering a living farce that threatens to return civilization to the Dark Ages.”
See also: grotesque, rococo, Kafkaesque, please everyone wake up. vmenon@thestar.ca