Pirates sequel sets SAIL
Latest film, billed as finale to franchise, is jam-packed with adventure, action, wizardry and plucky silliness
In the wake of the unseaworthy On Stranger Tides, Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales sails in six years later to swab the deck with an adventure packed with action, CGI wizardry and plucky silliness.
It makes up for Rob Marshall’s 2011misfire, bringing flashes of old Curse of the Black Pearl humour, courtesy of Johnny Depp’s dipsomaniac sea captain, Jack Sparrow, whose slurred observations include that the itch a lovesick fellow can’t scratch could just be scabies. He’s back to sashay, mug and mumble (some of his lines sound like they’re spoken into a bowl of oatmeal) his way through what’s being billed as the final chapter in this pirate’s life journey.
Plus there’s a memorable new villain on board with Javier Bardem’s creepily vengeful Captain Salazar. An occasionally overstuffed tale that drags as it heads for port, the heart of this Pirates adventure is yet another quest for a magic something. This time it’s the Trident of Poseidon, which gives ocean-ruling (and more important, curse-breaking) power to its owner.
Everyone from the redcoats on the King’s ships to the most scurvy pirate is chasing the magic spear.
Jack also has a ghoulish foe to contend with in Bardem’s vengeful Salazar, a masterful CGI creation of a creepy half-decayed figure cursed to never set foot on land. He perpetually appears to be floating underwater, even standing on a ship’s deck, and it’s a fantastic effect. So, too, is his artfully truncated zombie crew. And their zombie sharks.
They’ve all managed to escape their Devil’s Triangle limbo on a skeletal ghost ship to continue Salazar’s work to rid the seas of all pirates — especially his hated rival Sparrow.
He ensures there’s one survivor on each ship to recount the bloody quest — the dead men tell no tales of the title.
Depp’s rarely sober Sparrow has more immediate concerns. He’s landlocked, broke and poutingly miserable. His crew has abandoned him. He’s making worse than usual decisions. And he’s also not happy about having to team with jailhouse acquaintances and fellow Trident seekers, astronomer Carina ( The Maze Runner’s Kaya Scodelario) and sailor Henry (Brenton Thwaites of Gods of Egypt).
Norwegian directors Joachim Ronning and Espen Sandberg (2013’s Oscar-nominated Kon-Tiki) keep the action coming early on, with a Nantucket sleigh ride-style finale to a rollicking bank job and a village square execution-turned-donnybrook that features a tumbling guillotine.
Enter Geoffrey Rush’s slippery Capt. Hector Barbossa, who’s back and living the Midas life. Teaming with Salazar might just get both bag guys what they’re after.
Ronning and Sandberg pile on sword fights, sea battles and mythic creatures with a spectacular, watery finale that echoes a Biblical epic.
Writer Jeff Nathanson ( Catch Me If You Can) has come up with some solid laughs. An exchange where Sparrow and crew encounter the word “horologist” hearkens back to the fun of the original Black Pearl, while the story ties up loose ends and fills in backstories for key characters, including one with surprising visual effects. Popcorn munchers and franchise fans will find plenty to like.
Newcomer Scodelario is an engaging addition to the Pirates crew as the smart and driven scientist. Depp plays a lesser role and isn’t back to his Oscar-nominated original form but is still entertaining.
As for the rock star cameo, Keith Richards is replaced by Paul McCartney for a ho-hum, brief scene that makes us miss Keef’s pirate swagger.
While dead men may tell no tales, there’s no moratorium on spilling sequels to further the franchise’s perennial box-office bonanza. The adventure is being billed as the finale, but winds up leaving the door wide open for Pirates 6, you savvy?