Strange ease in online meet-up
Her dating site profile stood out and Burt was instantly attracted to her
Burt is a 55-year-old contractor who lives in the west end. He says “I’m energetic, slim and fit. I like to dress respectably; I’m wearing jeans and a jacket most of the time.” Burt is a widower, and his friends say he was a wonderful husband and caregiver to his wife. Burt is “happy to help others. I like to laugh, and engage with people.” Burt likes cars and motorcycles, and going to related events, as well as trying new restaurants and entertaining at his place. He says “I’m learning to cook, and haven’t poisoned anyone yet.”
I had just started to date after losing my wife when I met Lynn. I was hoping to meet someone about my own age, close to where I live, in approximately the same financial bracket at me, and I would prefer to date a widow.
I met Lynn at a restaurant. We had been chatting online, on an online-dating site that my kids insisted I join.
I was also immediately attracted to her photos. She was very good-looking, but the way she gazed directly at the camera, and that she wasn’t hiding behind huge sunglasses and that there weren’t any pictures of her dog, cat or birds, spoke volumes about her. She was aware of the curl of her lip, the bit of hair falling over one eye. Simply put: She was on the dating site to market herself, and she meant business. I respected that.
Her profile was funny. Her screen name made me laugh, and like her photos, it told me something about who she was. Her written profile used proper punctuation, which was another clue about her. Lynn alluded to her family without giving away too much information. She included her area of residence without giving an actual address. She was safe and smart.
I asked her out several times and was turned down, but I was persistent. Neither of us were having great success meeting the right person. She finally agreed to the date.
We met at a popular chain restaurant. I was sitting in a booth near the front window. I noticed a very attractive woman coming towards the restaurant entrance and said to myself “Some lucky bastard is going to dinner with her.” When she turned and walked towards my table I almost fell out of my chair. I stopped breathing and sat there like a fool.
It was love at first sight. Neither of us were nervous when we met in person. We both said that. It was unusual for me. I was smitten, and by all accounts, so was she. Our date was to start at 5:30. We were still staring at each other at 8:30. We barely ate our meals.
The conversation was easy. We had a lot in common. A first date is an exploration. I ask, she asks.
Usually, there are a lot of oneword answers. Are you dating? Are you divorced? Are you retired? Usually this type of question is followed by a “What about you?” These questions encourage more, deeper questions, but that usually happens on the second date. On this date, we had so many “right” answers that we moved very quickly into the deeper conversation.
She seemed to like my demeanour. I sit up straight at the table. I don’t fuss with my phone. My pictures were accurate, and my disposition matched what I had written about myself. Most of all, I was on time for our first date.
At 8:30 we left the restaurant and sat in her car until after midnight. We had to leave and we both got out of the car. I asked if I could kiss her goodnight and she said yes. I asked again: yes, yes, yes. At 55 years old, I was necking with this beautiful woman on a first date in a public parking lot in the middle of the night. It was not what my kids had in mind when they forced me to sign up for the dating site.
I barely remember driving home. The next morning I called her and she asked “What the hell happened?” She said she has never been that open or forward with anyone. I was so green at dating, I didn’t know.
We dated until the wheels came off, due to some issues in her life.
She did leave me with one very good gift: She showed me that I could love again.
Burt rates his date (out of 10): 10