Brunch was great and pizza was promised, then poof!
Kathleen was casually dating Don for a few weeks, but she didn’t expect the text she got
Kathleen is 33, lives in King West and works in finance. She says, “My style is usually more fashionable, but I have been living in Lululemon and sweats since the beginning of quarantine.” She likes reading and working out and “usually, before all of this, going for drinks and to the movies for a relaxing night out.” Kathleen says, “I am someone who has worked my butt off to get into the best schools and land my dream job. I would love to meet someone and have that same level of achievement in my personal life as well. It’s tough seeing most of my friends getting married and having that part of their life that I’m missing.” She has been single for “a while” and says, “I highly value someone who is well-educated, and who has put thought into their life and is focused on their goals.”
I met Don for a drink one night after chatting online for about a week. I had recently re-downloaded all the dating apps and was eager to get started on my next round of “situationships.” I realize how awful that sounds, but that’s just the world we live in now: nobody really committing to anyone, just kind of seeing where things go. I thought I left this all behind in my 20s, but it turns out I did not!
Don’s profile intrigued me right away. I thought he had a somewhat stern look to him and he definitely exuded confidence. I work in a very masculine industry so I’m used to those kinds of guys. It’s very kill-or-be-killed. His write-up was also quite serious, with a hint of dry humour, which was a nice change from all the supposedly humorous selfies and the grandiose “I know the best spot in town for tacos” statements that have taken over the online dating world.
I am not sure what I expected when I met Don. Due to the seriousness of his online profile and the nature of his work, I expected someone who was overconfident and probably a bit full of himself. However, he was the complete opposite: kind, soft-spoken and a good conversationalist. He was very focused on me and learning about my life experiences. I got a positive vibe from him right away. He asked meaningful and thoughtful questions, and shared stories about his own life as well. We had a lot in common, including being from the same part of Toronto originally, and having similar interests.
We dated casually for a few weeks. We would text daily and, despite our demanding jobs, we made the effort to text when we had the time. We had been on a total of five dates, including dinner at his place, when he asked me if I wanted to come over to his place for brunch that weekend. This was before COVID, obviously!
I absolutely love brunch food and I was excited to see Don again. At this point, I assumed that things would naturally become more serious. I brought him a small host gift as a thank you, and he seemed delighted and kept saying how nice the gesture was.
As always, the conversation flowed easily, and we retreated to the couch after we finished eating, taking time to enjoy our coffee and each other’s company. He kissed me and told me he was happy he’d met me. I smiled and felt warm inside.
We hung out for a few more hours, enjoying more coffee, talking fervently about our lives and goals, and kissing intermittently. It was easy and he genuinely seemed interested in me. I mean, I would hope so, after all those dates! He asked me if I wanted to get pizza the next week. That night, when I was home, he texted that he’d loved having me over.
The next morning, I sent Don a text wishing him a good day at work. When I looked at my phone four hours later, I hadn’t heard from him but, knowing he was busy, I wasn’t all that surprised. I began to get anxious when it was approaching midnight and I still hadn’t heard back from him. Suddenly, a text from him popped up.
It said that he had met someone. No explanation. Just, “I met someone.” “I’m sorry?!” I replied. But that was it! We never did have that pizza together, because I literally never heard from Don again.
Kathleen rates her date (out of 10): 6