DOES SOMEONE YOU LOVE HAVE DEMENTIA?
Four Signs That it is Time for a Move
Within five years an estimated 937,000 Canadians will live with Alzheimer’s disease or a related dementia. According to the Alzheimer’s Society of Canada, as many as 74 percent of us know someone with dementia. Not only is it hard for the person living with this disease, it is also hard for their family and friends as they journey alongside. Families often grapple with “when is it time?” and “we want them to stay at home as long as possible”. With the progression of this disease, the time will come when a decision needs to be made about where to live. That decision comes with a number of questions regarding security, care, emotional and physical health, and recreational activities. Signs of advancing dementia will vary for every person, but there are four key things to watch for that may indicate it’s time to think about making a move:
1. Personal care: Dementia can affect a person’s sense of self, which often results in visible symptoms such as neglected appearance, or a need for prompting of everyday tasks like bathing and grooming.
2. Household maintenance: People living with dementia often find it hard to complete daily tasks, and looking around your loved one’s home can be revealing. An empty refrigerator (or one filled with expired food), mixed up medications, or a scorched pot in the garbage can all reveal that your family member is experiencing difficulty with day-to-day life.
3. Social engagement: When friends and family get together you may notice signs of dementia that are not otherwise evident. Dementia affects how people express themselves and understand what is being communicated to them. If your loved one is withdrawn and not engaging with others as they once did, or is deflecting questions about recent events it is important to ask yourself if they are having trouble remembering the past few days, or are having difficulty finding the right words to communicate.
4. Spousal protection: When a spouse notices that their partner is having trouble with memory or communication, it is not uncommon for them to attempt to cover up the difficulties by compensating for the dementia. You may notice your father is answering questions for your mother, or that one parent looks to the other for a cue before answering a question.
However, there are two indicators that a change must happen quickly:
• If the person with dementia wanders out of their home (even once) and returns safely this is a gift but is also a sure sign that it can happen again.
• The primary caregiver’s health and wellness is changing or declining which then changes the whole dynamic of what is needed. Too often families work hard to keep a loved one at home as long as possible, until the point of an emergency and then everything needs to move quickly. Some research will need to be done which can include contacting the LHIN for an assessment, contracting inhome care services, and deciding long term care or a private retirement home that cares for people with dementia. These questions and challenges met Cathy Chapin when her dad was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease. Together with her husband Ross, they tried to find a peaceful, person-centred place for her dad to live, ideally together with his wife of 60 years, but in the end Cathy’s parents lived apart until he died two years later. Cathy recalls “We realized the care Dad needed wasn’t available. We wanted to help other families avoid the pain we endured and decided to build a specialized home ourselves’. Highview is a purpose-built, secure residence that provides specialized care for people with Alzheimer’s disease and related dementia. Every resident has a private bedroom and ensuite bathroom. The goal of care is to create a home-like setting where persons with dementia feel loved and safe, where their needs are met, and they can engage in meaningful activities. “I am thrilled that there will be a top quality care option now available in our area, for people with dementia,” says Michelle Martin, Executive Director, Alzheimer Society – Waterloo Wellington. “Highview offers personalized care designed for each individual’s needs and lifestyles, in an at-home setting”. As much as Highview Residences is a nurturing home-like setting, security is always a priority. The buildings have been designed to keep residents safe, with staff present at all times, day and night, and a secure cottage and gardens. Since opening in London over fifteen years ago, Highview Residences has provided exceptional, loving care to many people. “With the Kitchener-Waterloo home open, this tradition will continue and we look forward to serving families, caregivers and residents alike”, Joy Birch, Chief Operating Officer, concludes.