COOL SPACE, UNDERWHELMING FOOD
Imagine a bustling Japanese pub, the air redolent of food seared over high heat: a boisterous crowd winding down after the end of the workday, enjoying pitchers of beer and selections of sake accompanying their snacks ...
Diners should not currently expect this at Kuro Restaurant and Bar, a self-professed izakaya that opened last July, with its pending-approval application for a liquor licence displayed outside a door off Albert Street.
Each time I drove past its frontage at the corner of University and Albert in Waterloo I tried to decipher the font. Was it Juro, Turo, a restaurant, or something else? Despite the eight reserved parking slots being occupied during our early evening midweek visit, our group of three was briefly the only one occupying a table in the airy, undecorated, largely empty space.
The eccentric font choice spills over into the most confusing menu I’ve seen since my career as a reviewer began. Black and white and coloured graphics, three languages, and two tiers of pricing are tightly jumbled in diminutive type over five columns. I was grateful I’d reunited my crack team of Asian-food specialists to help decipher it all, as the servers, though pleasant and willing, evinced little knowledge of the ingredients, and several attempts to clarify with the restaurant were unproductive.
We nibbled on complimentary, green and red-coloured seaweed as we contemplated ordering. Our server happily pointed out “the most popular” items, not necessarily what we were after. We opted to share a half-dozen dishes requesting they should come from the kitchen as they were ready: we didn’t anticipate our entire order would materialize within 10 minutes or so.
Ebi Tempura ($9.50 for five shrimp) were, as promised, enrobed in a tasty batter. But not in that ethereal hint-of-batter Japanese chefs seek to present. We contrasted them with Ebi Kushiyaki ($2.95 for two whole, skewered prawns.) Heads and shells on, the menu promised they were barbecued over slow indirect heat and flavoured by the smoking process and best enjoyed with — the unavailable — beer. According to staff they were cooked from scratch over a grill, but we found they were a bit mushy, not particularly hot or flavourful, and tricky to eat.
Fried Pig Cheek ($11.95) was also listed as a barbecue item but seemed more like a warmed cutlet: the menu described it as “grilled pork neck” so who knows what we ate — certainly not the servers. Teppan Squid ($12.45) ranged from tender through rubbery to burned crisp. The miso soup, part of one of the mains, was standard fare.
The fish in our Salmon Don ($12.45) was well cooked but came with a sweet sauce that seemed laden with cornstarch. It arrived with decent rice, and vegetables, including a large portion of chewy corn kernels.
Surely the Beef Sukiyaki ($19.45), the most popular of all the items they served, would be a standout? A hotpot in which meat and vegetables are simmered by the diners, it was a bit of a production. A burner was set on the crowded table, and we waited 10 to 15 minutes for the soy-based broth to come to cooking temperature. An accompanying plate of beef, cabbage, broccoli, noodles, fish and meatballs, and button and enoki mushrooms provided
the raw materials of the dish. The lump of barely defrosted fatstreaked meat was nothing like the tidy rolls depicted on the website. When we enquired as to the cut of beef, the server said “sliced.”
Though I’d not seek out the fish or other balls, it was all nice enough in a bland sort of way, until one of the servers came by and, unbidden, topped up our cooking liquid with water — rather than properly heated broth. It reduced the temperature, effectively terminating our meal.
No dessert options being available, we were in and out in just shy of an hour. While nothing was really bad, it could all have been so much more. There are better options in the region and none of us would rush to return to Kuro.
Assessing food, atmosphere, service and prices. Dining Out restaurant reviews are based on anonymous visits to the establishments. Restaurants do not pay for any portion of the meal. Alex Bielak can be reached at www.twitter.com/alexbielak.