Dare to soar in the field of falconry
I was driving in the countryside a few days ago when I passed a business that caught my eye — a professional falconry service.
Like, if you have any falconry needs, this is your one-stop shop.
Seeing this falconry operation made me feel like a failure as a person on many levels.
For one thing, I have no falconry needs, as far as I know, and now I feel inadequate and like less of a man because I don’t require any bird of prey services.
Not only that, I don’t even know what kind of services a professional falconer performs. Is this the kind of thing where if you lose a Frisbee on your roof, you call a falconer to send his bird to retrieve it? Or do you call a falconer to get rid of nuisance animals? Got a weasel in the chicken coop? Call in a falcon. But who do you call to get rid of the falcon ... and, hey, what the heck happened to all the chickens?
One practical use I can think of for a falcon is if you are involved in a sports team called the Falcons and you want to bring out a live falcon to pump up the crowd. However, this sounds like a concept that is destined for sports blooper immortality.
“Oh my goodness, the falcon has lost its mind, Jim! It’s in the Platinum Lounge and it’s mauling through the fans like they’re an all-you-can-beak nacho bar!”
On another level, I wondered if one would contact a falconer to take care of one’s personal falcon needs. Like, if you own a falcon and it needs a wing massage, a feather dusting or a new hood, do you go see a falconer?
What kind of cool person are you if you own and operate a falcon and schedule regular visits to the falcon spa? Just need a simple beak and talon sharpening? Come on in! No appointment necessary! We’ll have your bird feeling razor-sharp in no time.
So many questions. I can’t believe I drove right by this place without stopping in. What a coward.
The discovery that there is such a thing as professional falconry also makes me think that maybe I missed my calling. If you are operating a professional falconry business, I have to think you are absolutely living your best life.
I have since done some independent research, and it turns out falcons are not considered pets at all but are working birds. They are the original drones.
Professional falconers perform many important services like controlling nuisance birds around airports or farmlands. Falconry is indeed an age-old and time-honoured profession. The professional falconer is living a dream and changing the world one deadly flight at a time.
Falcons are raptors trained to hunt. They are also anti-social to the extreme. They don’t snuggle. They want nothing to do with people, even the ones who provide food and shelter.
For a person to carve out a career handling, training and working with these surly birds, you know they are following a love and a passion.
I can admire that and I can aspire to one day do something that requires me to hire a professional falcon handler. Something other than just losing a Frisbee.