Design dilemmas
Couples who redo a room often argue over choices
Who knew that couches could be so contentious? According to a new survey from digital design service Modsy, 26 per cent of couples who live together most often argue about sofas when it comes to their interior design. Decor came in at 19 per cent, with art at 10 per cent, and the dining room and bed both taking nine per cent.
The survey asked 1,000 cohabiting American couples how they work through the process of furnishing their environment together, and also covered matters relating to decision making and power struggles.
For instance, although almost half said they partake in “even decision making” with their partner, 62 per cent of couples say they're most willing to stand their ground over the living room. The biggest source of conflict was no surprise: 24 per cent said the budget caused the most disagreements.
“It's high emotional stakes on both sides because it's so personal,” Judy Ho, a neuropsychologist and author of Stop Self Sabotage, told Real Simple. “Homes are people's personal retreat, a type of sanctuary, and their basis for safety.”
And any couple attempting to redo their home now faces a particularly tricky situation. On one hand, many of us are spending more time at home and want to make our spaces more livable and comforting.
On the other, we're more stressed out than usual and feeling our sense of safety threatened amid the pandemic.
Combine that with the usual wrangling that comes with negotiations, and arguments seem inevitable. Modsy's design specialists offered three tips for making the process smoother.
1. Plan to purge equally. Each party is likely coming into this decision with a piece of furniture or two already, meaning there will most likely be duplicates. Go piece by piece to decide which furniture item is in the best condition, or to choose which knick-knacks are meaningful to both of you.
2. Align on your shared vision. Talk about the big stuff and the smaller stuff will fall into place. What does your partner value in a home? What are their must-haves and your hard-nos?
3. The right colour palette can bring everything together. Any two, three or nine visual styles can work together if you have one consistent colour palette. If you can agree on that one essential component of your home design, everything becomes so much easier.