FOR the schitt's FREAK in your life
Schitt's beginning to look a lot like Christmas, and if you're still stuck on what to get the Schitt's Creek fan in your life, there are plenty of goodies to choose from. Here are 10 of our favourites that pay tribute to the CBC comedy, writes Melissa Hank.
ROSEBUD MOTEL ROBE
The lucky recipient will swan around like they're a permanent resident of the Rosebud Motel, perhaps just a few doors away from Johnny (Eugene Levy), Moira (Catherine O'hara), Alexis (Annie Murphy) and David Rose (Dan Levy). The robe is 100-percent microfibre polyester, and has the motel's logo embroidered on the chest. Comes in one size. $52 at schittscreek.shop
THE WIGS OF MOIRA ROSE WATER COLOUR ART PRINT
Moira's wigs were truly works of art, so it makes sense that some of them are featured in this eight-by-10-inch watercolour print. Schitt's Creek hairstylist Ana Sorys told Elle that she had around 200 wigs at her disposal by the time the show ended in Season 6, and they came from around the globe. US$20 at etsy. com, from Amywikeart.
ROSEBUD MOTEL KEYCHAIN
At three-and-a-half inches long, this plastic keychain is perfect for stuffing stockings. It costs $8 at schittscreek.shop, but if you have an extra $2 million you can buy the real-life Rosebud Motel as the companion gift to end all companion gifts. The property, officially called The Hockley Motel in Mono, Ont., hit the market last month.
IT'S MY TURN TO TAKE A SELFISH — SCHITT'S CREEK WINE GLASS
David and Alexis were bickering in the Season 1 episode Wine and Roses, with both wanting to go out but their parents needing someone to keep them company. David wins by declaring “It's my turn to take a selfish,” and reminding Alexis that in 2010 he had to pick her up from a disastrous date in Dubai. Take your selfish in wine form, with this US$10 glass at etsy.com, from MyThreeGuysAndMe. Text comes in a variety of colours.
I'M TRYING VERY HARD NOT TO CONNECT WITH PEOPLE RIGHT NOW MUG
In the Season 1 episode The Drip, Johnny was livid about a leak in his room and demanded that his kids tell him the name of the Rosebud Motel receptionist. David's response, immortalized on this mug, is perfect for shooing people away before you've had your morning coffee. US$17.99 at etsy.com, from Print4meDesigns.
BEST WISHES WARMEST REGARDS, SCHITT'S CREEK DOOR MAT
The first “best wishes/warmest regards” exchange popped up in the Season 1 episode Little Sister, between David and Stevie as they're trying to be friends with benefits and Stevie has a date with another guy. But you can welcome your guests in, or bid them farewell, in like manner with this doormat made of coir (coconut husk) fibres and black vinyl backing. US$11.99 at etsy. com, from CatchyDoormats.
SCHITT'S CREEK SPOONS
The Season 2 episode Family Dinner saw David and Moira making enchiladas, but neither could make sense of the recipe's instructions to “fold in the cheese.” These wooden spoons commemorate the dialogue. FYI, for kitchen novices: folding in the cheese means to stir gently from the bottom of a mixture upward, folding it over the cheese on top, so it melts gently and doesn't break the sauce. US$11 at etsy.com, from HomewoodHive.
SCHITT'S CREEK ONESIE
Turn a regular baby into a soigné bébé with this onesie winking at Moira's pronunciation of the word. For kicks, ask, like Moira did in the Season 5 episode Roadkill, “Does bébé enjoy the theatre?” Then, pretend Bébé's gurgles are critiques of Waiting for Godot. The onesie comes in 100 per cent cotton, and in a variety of sizes and sleeve lengths. US$9.98 at etsy.com, from BlueGiraffeApparel.
ROSE APOTHECARY CANVAS TOTE BAG
Be kind to the environment and pretend you're a regular customer of David and Patrick's store for self care. As David described it, “It's a general store, but it's also a very specific store
... And, yes, we will be selling things, but it's more like a branded immersive experience.” The bag comes in beige and black, or black and white. US$18.77 at etsy.com, from PeytonsPlaceVinyl.
EW, COVID REUSABLE BLACK AND WHITE FACE MASK
It wouldn't be 2020 without a face mask recommendation. Alexis's “Ew, David!” catchphrase gets the anti-pandemic treatment with a reusable three-ply cotton mask. Fun fact: Alexis only says “Ew, David!” three times during the show's run, but an exasperated “David!” more than 200 times. The mask is US$9.84 at etsy.com, from Girlfriendsdesignsca.