How to wear a bikini when you’re over the age of 40
wearing a centrally heated girdle.
And now that I’m well past my bikini peak but still wearing one (you bet), I realise it’s not about yes or no, or time to put it away, but what makes you feel good, and making the necessary adjustments. Bikini wearers will stay in their bikinis come hell or high water; we will find a way because they are fun. Also, lets face it, because a one piece in a hot climate is purgatory and you may feel like you are wearing a centrally heated girdle.
So, yes you can wear a bikini in midlife. But there are rules. This is what you need to know:
If you are swimming in the UK in average weather, you are wearing a one piece. The time and place for the midlife bikini is in strong sun, lying on a sunlounger, within reach of a wrap.
1 2 Pick your time and place. You are not wearing your bikini — and that’s it:
You are not walking down to the beach, wandering to the ice cream shop, hopping onto a bar stool, the way you used to in the old days. You may do all of the above but covered up. Sor- ry, but that is the big rule. Don’t forget yourself and drift about in your bikini like a teenage temptress in a French film.
To wear on the move. A white Indian kurta — slightly sheer, and slit up the sides so you don’t look too Demis Roussos — is a good alternative for those who are allergic to beach kaftans and kimonos.
Elle Macpherson and Gwyneth Paltrow continue to wear their string tie bikinis (I know!) because they have the bodies of fit twentysomethings. The rest of us are wearing a more midlife appropriate bikini: not flimsy, small or high cut. (Toast do good coverage, and you can buy the tops and bottoms in different sizes. Also bikinis with a bit of ruching are surprisingly flattering, as are boy shorts, which you can find in surf shops). Avoid
4 Pick a grown up style:
bikini bottoms with a little modesty skirt. They just make you think: why wear one at all?
5
A high waisted bottom should be the answer to all our problems, but oddly you have to have the figure of Cara Delevingne to get away with them. They hardly suit anyone, and all of them are under 30, which is why you’ ll never see Elle or Gwynnie in big pants.
It’s not just bottoms, either, that are hard to wear big. Those tankinis are a definite no-no, the worst of both worlds, not to mention a bit ‘junior miss’. If you want that much coverage then go for a one piece.
But now it’s essential. If you have a torso that hasn’t seen the sun since last August, then you might be advised to invest in some tan in a tube.
6
No pelmets or ruffles. No bows, gingham or broderie anglais trims. Nothing cutesy, or fancy, or zip up the front, or lace up the side, or wetlook with a Bond Girl belt. You know this but we can all get carried away. No
7 That said, don’t cover up too much: A tan is always best: Ditch the frills:
tricks, especially not the ooh la la, sexy moi sort.
Oh hello @womenshealthmag and thank you ever so much for the opportunity to grace your cover! And @tracyandersonmethod, it’s all because of you. Link in profile for the secret A post shared by Gwyneth Paltrow (@gwynethpaltrow) on Mar 9, 2017 at 11:44am PST
Not saying you would, or were even thinking of it, but it’s cooler to play it down. You will not be needing the wide brimmed straw hat, the raffia wedges or lace-up gladiator sandals, or the pompom trim necklace and upper arm bracelet.
8 9
But the midlife bikini works best in sophisticated shades like olive, aubergine and chocolate. Polka dots are weirdly ageing. Navy is too sensible. Black — well it’s not working so well for anything else in our wardrobes, so, probably not.
The truth is when it comes to midlife bikinis versus the one piece you will alternate between the two, depending on how you feel. And it’s all about how you feel. Well, it is also about consideration for others. You owe it to your friends and family not to cross the line marked “makes us feel slightly uncomfortable”. That’s why we’ve put together this list.
10 No accessorising:
3
You will therefore want a light cover up:
The colour you choose will depend on your skin tone: Be flexible: