Mother’s love makes difference for disabled orphans in Ningxia
Liu Shuqin has raised 10 foster children in past 15 years
Like any stay-at-home mother, Liu Shuqin’s day starts with cooking breakfast, waking up her daughters and then sending them to school.
“Let mom help you with the buttons on your shirt,” Liu, 53, tells her 7-year-old daughter, Song Xinying.
Then she starts helping another daughter, Sima Yiding, now 18, with her hair. “See how mom combs your hair. Aren’t you my pretty girl?” she said.
The teenager seems shy and keeps her head down. “Yeah, it looks pretty,” she mumbled.
Xinying and Yiding, both mentally disabled, are among the 10 foster children Liu has raised since 2003 in Yinchuan, capital of the Ningxia Hui autonomous region.
They were abandoned by their birthparents when they were born. After spending time in an orphanage, they were sent to Liu’s home as part of China’s efforts to explore new ways of helping disabled orphans.
“They are slower than other kids. The little one still can’t use chopsticks after four years of learning,” Liu said. “But I see them as my own kids.”
Liu already had two children before she became a foster mother. Her own children were already teenagers when she took in her first foster child, Yiding, at the age of 3 in 2003.
“I never forget the day I saw her,” she said. “She was wearing a cute little hat and was so adorable.”
Liu thought it would not be a problem to care for the children, as she had already raised two. But it was harder than she expected. From teaching Yiding how to use the bathroom to being with her when she received treatment, Liu never gave up on her. She was her mother, teacher and rehabilitation trainer.
Four years ago, Liu had to stay in bed due to a waist injury. One day, when only she and Yiding were home, the then-14-year-old girl volunteered to bring her a glass of water. It seems natural for an ordinary child of that age, but Liu knew only too well how valuable it was for a child like Yiding. She was moved to tears.
“I felt all those years of caring were not in vain,” she said. “Although Yiding is not good at expressing her thoughts, she knew her mom was too ill to get out of bed and needed care.”
Xinying was 4 years old when she was sent to Liu’s home. Liu tried to teach her how to call her “mom” every day. But over a year passed and Xinying still did not know how to pronounce it. Liu was anxious.
On a fall morning in 2016, Xinying suddenly opened her mouth and called out “mom” twice. “I was too excited to say anything, and urged her to call me several more times,” Liu said.
The orphanage calculates a birthday for every child based on a health assessment when they were received. Yiding’s birthday is on May 12.
May 13 marked the last Mother’s Day Yiding spent with Liu. According to regulations, foster children have to be transferred to a social welfare institute when they turn 18. Yiding needs to leave the home where she has spent the past 15 years.
Liu knows that Yiding must go and learn to be independent, but she said she hates saying goodbye to her daughter.
“I taught her some basic embroidery skills and hopefully she can find a job,” Liu said. But she knows that Yiding’s future is full of uncertainty.
Liu has spent 15 years raising orphans by herself. “Including my own, I’m proud to say that I have 12 children,” she said.
In Huifeng village, in Yinchuan’s Yongning county, 100 disabled orphans are now living with 57 foster families. Over the past 17 years, 328 children have lived in 102 households.
Yang Jinkai, 27, was lucky to spend his childhood in a foster home. He now has a job and is comfortable interacting with society.
“In addition to material satisfaction, I found psychological comfort from my foster parents and siblings,” Yang said. “Without them, I would have become a kid without parents.”
Du Yong, head of the Ningxia children’s welfare home, said compared with children who are raised in a welfare institution, children from foster families are emotionally healthier. The parent-child relationship and family life are valuable throughout their whole lives.
Wang Jin, director of the welfare home’s family fostercare center, agreed.
“As people like us, orphans have the desire and are entitled to live with a family and feel the warmth extended by people around them,” Wang said. “They have been abandoned once. Society cannot let them be abandoned again.”