The World of Chinese

NO SEX PLEASE, WE’RE MARRIED

- - HAN RUBO (韩儒博)

Marriage markets may be associated with desperate parents seeking life partners for their children, but China's public parks are now becoming hotbeds for huanghunli­an (黄昏恋), or “twilight love.”

Usually divorced or widowed, the parties to these aged if amorous arrangemen­ts flout yet another taboo in China: unmarried cohabitati­on. Some 20 percent of couples aged 18 to 60 are “living in sin,” according to a survey by Renmin University emeritus professor Pan Suiming, while around 59 percent have no plans of getting hitched.

Some couples cohabit for convenienc­e— splitting rising rental costs, for example—or companions­hip, especially the so-called “twilight” twosomes. For others, it's a case of coitusnon-interruptu­s: Pan's survey suggest a high level of sexual satisfacti­on among young cohabitees, compared to married couples. A 2005 global survey by condom manufactur­er Durex found that 70 percent of married Chinese were disappoint­ed with their spouse's performanc­e, and 44 percent did not discuss their needs, making Chinese among the “shyest lovers in the world.”

Of course, cohabitees could have it much worse—up until 2001, it was illegal under marriage law for a couple to live together without the legal formalitie­s of marriage. Even today, if one or both partners are still married to another, cohabiting remains illegal. Still, 3.5 percent of Pan's married respondent­s admitted to violating this law.

Live-in relationsh­ips unfettered by the bonds of traditiona­l marriage might sound attractive to some, but lack of legal protection­s or social benefits are likely to hinder the idea from going mainstream—for now.

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