We’re both cheating

My husband has cheated on me several times with different women some I know and some I find out when I go through his phone. Late last year I got tired and eventually stopped being intimate with him when I found out that he impregnated his baby mama. In fact I think that’s when I stopped caring about my marriage, because for years I asked him not to be too friendly with her and he kept lying to me that they were only talking about their child, yet they were having an affair the whole time behind my back.

I decided to date a guy I met at work who is our supplier. I eventually took him up on the coffee date that he had been nagging me for. I found out that he was a great guy and we have been spending wild nights twice a month. I think I have fallen for him; he’s also married and unhappy in his marriage. I don’t know what to do, should I leave my husband as I long stopped loving him anyway. Anonymous

RESPONSE:

Dear anonymous let me guess you both want to run away together and start a happy life somewhere. Unfortunately this is not a fairy-tale situation, you both married to other people, what you both doing is wrong. I get the reasons why you stopped loving your husband, but if you that unhappy why don’t you make it official and your boyfriend does the same if he’s serious about you. There is no solid foundation in this new relationship. It seems both of you are using each other to ‘escape’ your rocky marriages. If you want a serious relationship, you both know what you need to do first, other than that, you no different from what your husband is doing right now.