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MPSYCHODELIC STALL RUNSFORD LARYEA
OST of who we are today is somewhat of a summation of what we have learned and experienced in the past, as well as what we know presently. Our backgrounds, our childhoods and everyday social involvements are the various platforms from which we, as individuals, use to form and create our self-image, perceptions of ourselves among our peers and also a general idea of what our potential and capabilities may be.
Of course friends and close family are key players in this, given that it is from them that we assimilate most of the social and psycho-emotional tools we then use to forge our individual paths to adulthood. Many of the general things we learn from an early age become engrained in our ‘mental software’ and this does not change when it comes to certain traumatic experiences, for instance, something we grew up being told about ourselves by a parent or peer.
Unfortunately, the potency of some of the things we experience and those we are led to believe about ourselves from a young age may be way stronger than we can comprehend at the time, however, the implications and manifestations of it are potentially life-long and heavily influential in determining how that individual eventually ‘turns out’.
Chances
If you grew up in an unhealthy, toxic and strained socio-emotional environment, where you were constantly belittled, ridiculed and consistently downplayed, chances are that will most likely be what you begin to adopt and believe about your prospects.
Overtime, you hold it to so much truth; you begin to make it a part of your internal belief system and a point of reference for every key life decisions you have to make in future. What this does is, it robs you of your confidence, motivation and willingness to actually do anything because the base of all your intention to pursue, achieve or create something of yourself is fragile and so intoxicated.
For many adults, especially, it has been a life-long battle with themselves while attempting to unlearn, reinvent and recreate themelves as individuals upon realizing they have spent most of their lives being held back by inaccurate presumptions that were bestowed upon them with the intentions of crippling their psycho-emotional development.
The number of people who have gone through life believing they are not worth being loved, for instance, or believing they were never good enough for anything, is quite astounding while at the same time quite saddening to think why someone would plant that in the psychological build-up of someone else.
This also speaks to the very importance of having a solid social support system in place for your children (young or old), a support system that does just that; support, encourage, praise and uplift where necessary to offer every individual an adequate chance to realize the good in themselves, express their talents and to breed an air of general acceptance in and around others.
Negative
The process of unlearning all that is false about yourself is a long and winding one because, just as it took a while for you to start believing the negative about yourself, it may take equally as long to start appreciating the positives. While you do that, make sure the company you keep is emotionally rewarding and psychologically refreshing to you – people who are positive, cheerful and offer good advice are important.
Also, pursue all the things you may have been told you were not good enough to do (whatever they may be), as that may serve as a source of reassurance and validation that you are able and good enough. Find a relationship that is warm and reassuring of your worth as an individual and generally, do what makes you happiest. Send comments to runsford0505@gmail.com