Here’s exactly what to do when you find out you have an STI

Testing positive shouldn’t be a source of embarrassment or instant panic

April is Sexually Transmitted Disease Awareness Month, which makes it a great time to think about what you would do if you contracted an STI — after all, around half of the human population will get one at some point. While that might seem a little scary, it also means that testing positive shouldn’t be a source of embarrassment or instant panic.

Most STIs are treatable if you manage them properly, says Anne Hodder, a sex and relationship coach who teaches about STIs with Planned Parenthood Los Angeles, USA.

But once you find out you’ve got one, it’s hard to know how to start handling it responsibly.

If your health care clinic (or athome test) reveals you’ve contracted an STI, here are the first steps to take to make sure you’re keeping yourself and your partners safe.

1. See a doctor

Ask your doctor or another health care provider (like someone from Planned Parenthood) every question you can think of. Don’t hold back — they’ve heard everything. Also, ask where you can look online if more questions come up. Hodder recommends the sites for Planned Parenthood, the CDC, and Scarleteen.

“Do your best not to self-diagnose or fall down the Internet spiral, because there is a sea of misinformation, harmful and shaming rhetoric, and factually inaccurate information out there about STIs and treatment,” she says. A lot of STIs get worse — and spread more frequently — if you wait to treat them. If you don’t take care of HPV right away, for instance, it could lead to cervical cancer, and some STIs can decrease your fertility. So head to the drugstore ASAP once you have a prescription. Viral STIs like herpes and HPV aren’t curable, but they are treatable, and bacterial ones like gonorrhea and chlamydia can usually be cured with antibiotics.

Even if your symptoms go away, you still need to strictly follow the treatment plan your health care provider prescribes.

3. Tell your partners ASAP

Your partners won’t necessarily have your STI, but anyone you’ve had sexual contact since you last tested negative could have gotten it. Out of respect for them, let them know about your results.

While this kind of potentially upsetting news would probably be best coming directly from you, the most important thing is that they’re notified. Period.

4. Practice safe sex

Hold off on having sex until you’ve talked to a professional. After that, use condoms and dental dams or abstain from sex until a bacterial STI is gone. If you’ve got an STI that can’t be cured, it’s more easily spread when you have a sore or another open infection, so some couples just use barriers or abstain during those times. But you can also spread the virus when you don’t have any symptoms, so avoid unprotected sex.

There’s no single right way to handle this scenario — it just depends on what you’re both comfortable with.