Let’s stop pretending that all is well with our children

Parents who have read the Fiji Sun over the past few days would have no doubt read about naked pictures of young tertiary students found in a Drpbox. They have gone viral inside and outside universities.

Ninety per cent of the victims of these leaks – young women whose naked pictures have been uploaded to the Dropbox – are from the Indo-Fijian community. They have been victimised by young men who are also from the Indo-Fijian community.

The reason we are revealing this detail is to raise awareness and to urge parents to reach out to their children, their young women, and to talk to them. You cannot turn a blind eye to this. We have received a number of comments where people are aware of the identity of the victims and the perpetrators. There are two serious issues here:

The fact that girls have been sending naked pictures of themselves; and

Secondly, there are our sons out there who are taking advantage of young women and displaying their nude photographs for everyone to see. Another serious issue has been highlighted. Young men are also selling these photographs at the University of the South Pacific’s student car park area and are also placing bets on them. They place bets on how they can identify the girls by seeing their nudes. This is disgusting behaviour and shows the manner in which our women are being objectified by these young men. It is part of a deeply sexist attitude present in our communities that regards women as sex objects.

But where have they learned this? How can they disrespect women in such a manner and how is it that their parents are so unaware about what their children are up to?

Where are we failing as parents? Where have we failed in raising our children? These are some tough questions every parent needs to ask themselves. There is a high chance that your teenage daughter is sexually active and has sent nude photographs to her partner. You may be just fooling yourself if you pretend that you have a perfect little angel at home who is well versed with abstinence.

You’re not doing any favours to your daughters. They need to be told the dangers of technology. Any email can easily be hacked these days. Nothing is safe. We need to focus on our sons also, our young men. The most important lesson we need to teach them is to respect women. They must not think it is alright for them to distribute nude pictures of any woman. We cannot blame this on peer pressure.

It’s obvious our cultural and religious values are fast fading and as parents we are failing in our duty to pass them on to our children.

We have to share the blame and take some responsibility of the actions of our children. Please talk to your teenage children now. They need a friend at this age. Teach your daughters to value themselves and teach your sons to respect others. We cannot pretend that all is well. It is not.