Jokes

JUST FOR LAUGHS

Why did the diet coach send her clients to the paint store?

She heard you could get thinner there.

What do you call someone who can’t stick with a diet?

A desserter.

A whale swims all day, only consumes fish and water, and is fat. A rabbit only eats vegetables, runs and hops all day long, and only lives five years.

Meanwhile, a tortoise doesn’t run and does nothing energetic, yet it lives for 450 years. And you tell me to eat well and exercise! I don’t think so.

I hate brushing my teeth at night because that signifies that you can’t have any more food.

I’m just never ready for that kind of commitment.

I choked on a carrot this afternoon, and all I could think was, “I bet a donut wouldn’t have done this to me.”

All my life I thought air was free… until I bought a bag of chips.