Jokes

JUST FOR LAUGHS

Answers on my hand

Since the coronavirus outbreak, a 47-year-old man has been washing his hands religiously. In fact, he said, “I’ve been washing my hands so much, I found the answers to an old eighth-grade math quiz.”

Make me a sandwich

My husband and I were daydreaming about what we would do if we won the lottery. I started: “I’d hire a cook so that I could just say, ‘Hey, make me a sandwich!’” Thomas shook his head. “Not me. I already have one of those.”

Previously beautiful

Teaching is not for sensitive souls. While reviewing future, past, and present tenses with my English class, I posed this question: “‘I am beautiful’ is what tense?” One student raised her hand. “Past tense.”