IT IS NICE TO BE IMPORTANT BUT IT IS MORE IMPORTANT TO BE NICE

Mayur Kalbag is a Leadership Coach, Corporate Trainer & Author who regulalry does corporate training in Fiji. This will be his regular column in our Jobs section on Saturdays providing readers some useful tips. He can be contacted via email: mayurkalbag@ hotmail.com

I have always believed that despite all the management or technical qualifications every professional and especially a leader or manager must realize that it nice to be important but it is more important to be nice! I wish to highlight this with an interesting and inspiring real-life example.

Ravikesh had just recently joined a publishing organization as its marketing general manager. He was not only a PHD (Doctorate) in the subject of marketing but also had been a gold medalist in MBA (Master of Business Administration). As expected, he commanded a lot of respect for his achievements. It was a Saturday and Ravikesh had called all his team members for the weekly review meeting. Praneel was one of the young team members and a successful one as well. However, this time though he was a bit nervous as he had not achieved his budget (target). This was the first time Praneel and the others were interacting with Ravikesh, their new Marketing General Manager. The meeting started and after an hour of review it was Praneel’s turn to make his presentation. It was quite clear to everyone that he had not been able to fulfill the expectations. As Praneel was just about to conclude his presentation Ravikesh stood up and, to the shock of everyone present there, he started quite literally scolding Praneel. “I am extremely disappointed with you. While the others in my team have overachieved their respective budgets you have completely lagged behind and there you are, without any sense of regret. This is not done Praneel. I cannot tolerate people who are under-achievers and hence I am going to give just one more chance to perform or else!” Praneel was completely demoralized. “Sir, please can I at least explain my situation and the reasons for my non-performance?” he gently pleaded. “Praneel, I am not interested in your excuses” Ravikesh’s rude and curt words pained Praneel a lot and he was almost in tears. Suddenly, there was a knock on the door of the conference room. “If you don’t mind, can I please join your review meeting?” it was Mr. Peter, the Managing Director himself. “Sure Sir” replied Ravikesh. Peter greeted all the team members and calmly sat on the chair and began addressing the entire team. “My cabin is just beside this room and I must admit I heard some of the conversations that were happening and it is for this reason that I decided to come and talk to all of you and especially to your marketing general manager. Dear Ravikesh, you have joined our organization a month ago and I wish you the very best. But I want to ask you a question. Have you taken the time to see the past ‘records of work’ of all your team members?” “Actually, I did not as I have had very little time”

Ravikesh replied in a slightly nervous tone. Peter then continued, “Well! If you haven’t, then let me please enlighten you. Among all these team members seated here the one who has been consistently and successfully achieving and at times over-achieving his budgets has been none other than Praneel. In fact, just three months back Praneel was shortlisted by the international publishing council for the international performer of the year award! Were you aware of this Mr. Ravikesh?” Peter asked politely. “I truly had no clue” he replied. “Do you know why Praneel was unable to achieve his budgets this time? Well, since the past month his mother has been extremely sick with a terminal illness and due to this, he has been with her at the hospital most of the time. It was something he had to do and I am proud that he did that. Dear Ravikesh, you have just joined us and you still are getting to know your team. I heard you scolding Praneel on top of your voice and that too in front of the entire team. Remember, the most important quality for any leader or manager is to be nice to people and what I mean by ‘nice’ is to become truly ‘empathetic’. You just jumped to the conclusion that Praneel was good for nothing. I would have liked it if you would have at the least sought an explanation from him as that would have made you understand his circumstances. Honestly, your attitude was that of arrogance and domination. In this organization we believe it is nice to be important but it is more important to be nice. Please do not get offended by my words. I am sharing this with you and all the others as a lesson that we all can learn. When I say that leaders must be nice all I am saying is that they must develop the attitude of empathy, helpfulness, listening to understand, respectfulness, motivating and guiding the team members rather than simply criticizing them for their mistakes or failures. Also important is the use of a polite tone especially in situations where rudeness could be natural” Saying this Peter thanked the entire team for their passionate efforts and wished them the best. Ravikesh suddenly stood up and began addressing the group. “Mr. Peter, today I have learnt a very important lesson. I always thought I was better than the others but never realized that I was becoming all the more arrogant and egoistic. As I stand here, I want to most sincerely apologize to our dear team member, Praneel. I was extremely shallow in the way I assessed you and I assure all of you that from today onward I will surely bring a positive change within me” Hearing this Peter began gently applauding Ravikesh’s lovely gesture and all the others, including Praneel joined in the applause. I hope that from this real-life example we too have learnt some positive lessons!