No feelings

Dear Minerva,

I am a 16-year-old girl, who is in a relationship with a guy I do not like.

This relationship, so far, has seen some amount of kissing, which does not move me in any way.

Why am I in this relationship, you might ask? Well because this guy really likes me and would do anything for me. So I guess you could say I am benefiting from it in a way.

I don’t have feelings for him and I don’t trust him either. This is not the first time I have been in this situation and although I am fine with it I feel there is something wrong.

What I want to know is why I don’t have feelings for whoever I have a relationship with and why I don’t trust them?

Curious Dear Curious, It is possible that you really are curious – that you want the experience of being in a relationship, but without the emotional involvement it entails. While there is nothing wrong with that, it is strange to see it in someone so young. I would advise that you refrain from these relationships because you are not mature enough to handle them. There is no easy way to hurt someone and not everyone walks away calmly when they are hurt.

At 16, you are not that unfeeling— though you might think you are—to remain unaffected. You are better off observing from the sidelines, at least until you are a little older. Otherwise, you stand the risk of being hurt yourself eventually or of becoming cynical at a much too young age.