to Set Your Most In­ti­mate Re­la­tion­ship On Fire! (We’re Talk­ing About Your Weigh­ing Scale)

Do you have a tur­bu­lent re­la­tion­ship with your weigh­ing ma­chine? Does it make you cry af­ter a date, not lis­ten to you, and be­have like it just doesn’t give a damn? Wipe those tears, be­cause there are clever ways to boost your two­some...

Cosmopolitan (India) - - HEALTH - By Kalli Purie

Okay, we are not talk­ing about your re­la­tion­ship with your BF. And we’re are not be­ing sar­cas­tic about your mother- in- law. And, we are not su­gar coat­ing a vagina mono­logue. We are talk­ing about one of the most im­por­tant re­la­tion­ships a girl has in her life. It’s the one with her weigh­ing scale. I bet women think about their weight a lot more than men think about sex. I know I do. But that’s be­cause I am a se­rial di­eter. I think about my weight a lot. And it pretty much de­fines every­thing I do, from what I do at work, to who I flirt with at a party.

Your see, our weight is closely con­nected with con­fi­fi­dence and how we feel about our­selves. That tiny stupid ma­chine has such a dis­pro­por­tion­ately large power over me, it’s ridicu­lous. The day it wakes up in a bad mood every­thing goes wrong. So here’s how to keep things hot and sexy with your weigh­ing scale... Cheat on your diet, not with choco­late cake ( we should all be so lucky), but with an­other diet. And while you’re at it, cheat on your workout too, not by cud­dling with a du­vet, but with an­other workout. Spic­ing things up keeps the body on its toes. Your body doesn’t know how to re­act, and this helps it cut weight. When you are on the same diet or workout regime for a long time, your body gets used to it and, over time, re­fuses to shed those ki­los. Cheat­ing on your reg­u­lar rou­tine shocks the body and gives bet­ter re­sults. Size def­i­nitely mat­ters, but for this re­la­tion­ship, we pre­fer it small. Small is good. Small works. Por­tion

con­trol means you don’t deny your­self any food, but you re­strict quan­tity. The eas­i­est way to do that is to have a no- sec­onds rules. No mat­ter what. And eat from a smaller plate, so the plate looks full but there is less food on it. Do the lis­ten­ing when you are wait­ing for your food and do the talk­ing when the food ar­rives. When you do the talk­ing, you have to take long breaks be­tween bites.

Meet your weigh­ing scale at least once a day. Take your time. Get un­dressed lux­u­ri­ously. Pray a lit­tle for all your pre­vi­ous night’s sins and hop on. And lis­ten to your scale. It speaks the truth.

Well, ‘naughty’ was just to get your at­ten­tion. But find a diet buddy and send her your weight on a strict daily ba­sis. That way, some­one else is in charge of en­sur­ing you are get­ting on that scale. Choose some­one who will take her task se­ri­ously. That way, you will en­sure you are com­mu­ni­cat­ing with your scale daily.

Buf­fet is a food orgy. Too many cuisines. Too much choice. No rules on help­ings, plates or por­tions. This is a to­tal no-no. Al­ways or­der á la carte. One dish. One choice. One por­tion. Be faith­ful to your plate.

Fan­ta­sise about food. Imag­ine that dark choco­late melt­ing in your mouth. Taste it in your fan­tasy and then drop it. Fan­tasies have no calo­ries.

Hav­ing a clear tar­get like a hot dress to fit into for D-day is a great way to stay on fo­cus. Try it on. Swirl in it, twirl in it. Take a pic­ture of it. Make it larger-than-life in your head. Know that it will look hot­ter a cou­ple of ki­los down.

Skip­ping din­ner is a good way to com­pen­sate for other ex­cesses through the day. So when in doubt, just don’t come down for din­ner. Don’t sit at the din­ing ta­ble. Don’t let your body pre­pare it­self for din­ner. Just ig­nore the meal al­to­gether.

Talk about your weight and your weight-loss plan. Don’t be shy. It’s im­pos­si­ble to diet in se­cret. And the more peo­ple you tell, the more food po­lice you will have mon­i­tor­ing your ef­forts. So tell your friends, fam­ily, even that nosey neigh­bour. Yes, all that at­ten­tion to your weight can be very ir­ri­tat­ing and in­tru­sive, but it’s highly ef­fec­tive.

Say yes to a three­some. No, not the one in­volv­ing two hot six-pack six-foot­ers, but sand­wich work outs. Where you ba­si­cally sand­wich an in­ten­sive set be­tween two lighter sets. For ex­am­ple, you walk 200 me­tres, run 100 me­tres, and then walk 200 me­tres again. Then re­peat the cy­cle. It’s called in­ter­val train­ing and is great for weight loss. As you get fit­ter, sand­wich the walk be­tween two runs.

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