Ask Cosmo Anything
From random little issues to major life dramas, we’ve got your back.
Q.My boyfriend and I are both 23. I’ve been with him for three months and we’re discussing having sex. I’m keen, but nervous. Should I go for it? Or is three months too short a time to tell if he’s right for me and if I can trust him?
A: Doesn’t time pass fast when you’re having fun? Even three days can be long enough for two people to know the time is right for love. The key thing is the knowing, not how long it takes to get there. Do nothing until you’re both sure you want to take the next step together.
Q: My fiancé’s dad doesn’t like me. He’s sarcastic towards me, though never openly rude. When we reach their house, he greets his son but never greets me. I can find no common ground with him and if we’re alone in a room, he leaves as quickly as possible. I’ve raised the issue with my fiancé but he says he hasn’t noticed anything. Suggestions?
A: In-laws often cause issues in a relationship, but there are things you can do to help the situation. First, never ask your fiancé to fight your battle with his father—you’ll lose in the end. Second, build strong ties with the friendly members of his family—they’ll stick up for you if there are any talks behind your back. Third, be patient. His father possibly sees you as a threat to his own relationship with his son. Give him time to get used to you being around. Finally, ask his father about himself—his work, ambitions, history—and listen with real interest. Nothing brings a person round as flattering curiosity about their life and opinions.
Q: I’ve liked this guy for ages and we get on really well. But recently my so-called best friend’s been flirting with him. She craves attention and even copies me. I can’t stand it...and I can’t stop thinking about him and her either.
A: Envy has come between you. She envies your personality, your status with others or your intelligence. And she gets away with flirting with the man you like because you lack confidence. When she’s around, bite your lip and smile. Work on your self-esteem by doing new things and making new friends. As for the man you like, chat and share a laugh when you bump into him. That’s enough for now.
Q: The polka-dot trend seems to be a real fave with celebs. How can I work it (without looking like Minnie)?
A: Spots are such a fun trend, and really not that tough to work. If your dots are classic black and white, pay attention to the silhouette... a grown-up shape or midi length will nix any Minnie references. For a more fash-forward take, consider mixing your polkas with another print (like a dotted skirt with a floral shirt). Finally, match this trend to your body type. If the dots on a dress start small and get larger at the bottom, they’ll make your waist and bust appear slimmer.