Silence of the...

when someone has the fortitude and strength to bring it out in the open, comments like ‘are you sure’, ‘is it an exaggeration’, which said to an individual who has had the resolve to come clean makes it even more difficult and anguishing.”

The reality percolates through a desi sensibility that is wrought with self-doubt, escapism and ignorance (what you don’t know cannot hurt you). There are cases of sexual harassment that have come to the fore, but leave alone a few high profile cases like that of Tarun Tejpal, R.K. Pachauri, David Davidar, Phaneesh Murthy, etc, most such claims are either hidden under a veil of silence by the victim, suppressed by organisations or acknowledged for a staggering fee that buys silence. This is India today, anyone with a conscience would surely cringe.

Actress Sumalatha Ambareesh comes from an era when the casting couch was a regular phenomenon, and voicing such views was considered sacrilege, and she too is troubled by this lack of responsibility and accountability, and addresses the pernicious nature that lives and breathes in our social fabric, “If you are asking me specifically about men in the movie industry, I would say certain kind of men exist everywhere, in every workplace, wherever they feel powerful enough. It’s only the famous names which draw attention. Lakhs of working women suffer too, silently. Let me begin with how I started my day, by reading about a teenage actress being molested on a flight, and coming across the terrible news of three girls under six years in different villages raped and one also killed in an unspeakable perverted manner. Is there any appropriate punishment in our system for sick beasts like these? There is no doubt whatsover that women of every age in every country have been prey, and victims of sexual predators and those men deserve no sympathy. Women have been made to keep quiet, made to feel ashamed just for being the unwilling victims of unwanted attention just because for centuries men have gotten away with sexual harassment of every kind. And it’s always been the victim who is shamed, and never the perpetrator. I think it’s high time, and rightly so, that sexual offenders are named and shamed finally. Maybe this will keep atleast that section of society which has escaped for too long, and is wary of the notoriety involved, in check. However, very unfortunately and horrifically, we still don’t have solutions for the thousands of rapists, paedophiles and hardcore criminals who rape and kill even children, and get away with it.”

Wendell speaks of the glamour quotient to such revelations, concerned about how we view sexual harassment, “Everybody seems to be looking at the story because of the glamour industry involved, but look at the Tarun Tajpal case, and there are many more hidden, sexual harassment instances across the board. This abuse, this sense of power, is not only a criminal offence, it is a moral sin. And it’s happening everywhere, I personally feel that if someone came up and spoke about it, then it will atleast be a start for others to gather strength to speak up. In my own industry, male models are propositioned and they know if they do not comply, the climb up the ladder will be slow, or none.”

While the West has come a long way in acknowledging such behaviour without fear of recrimination, as in the case of Harvey Weinstein, and Larry Nassar’s victims, each of whom spoke of the abuse in scary detail, the Indian dilemma lies in brushing such issues aside. But for how long?

While Harvey Weinstein and men like him deserve all the backlash and outrage according to actress Sumalatha, she hopes that innocent men are not targetted in this wave, voicing concerns about such campaigns, “There is always another side to this... the only downside is the chance of misusing a trend to unleash maybe manipulation/blackmail/vendetta that might also occur, especially if it comes to a high-profile person. Unfortunately, opportunists exist in both genders. So how to strike a balance is a million-dollar question. But women have been victimised forever, so this would be an unfortunate fallout and though it’s not ideal, it can’t be helped either. The government should be thinking very, very seriously about changes in law regarding women safety, no compromises should be acceptable. Think about this, not all men are rapists or sexual offenders, but all rapists are men — that’s the sad truth. It’s time we put an end to being victimised. It is time men realise that No means No!” A senior lawyer who is on the board of various Anti-Sexual Harassment Committees is cautious, “The MeToo campaign is a good movement, and hopefully it would give women the courage to speak up and complain on the right forum. But being on various Anti-Sexual Harassment committees, I’ve also seen numerous frivolous complaints because of relationships going sour, promotions being delayed, etc. and I just hope this movement is not abused by even a few individuals.” A caution that needs to be taken into cognizance.

For Gajra Kottary, award-winning screenplay writer and author of Girls Don’t Cry, the ramifications of not acknowledging sexual abuse or harassment can be far reaching. She says, “The warning is real. Since more men than even the best of us can imagine are closet sexual predators, there is a fear psychosis among them that their secrets might be out next, with women being encouraged to speak out. So male employers, in the name of playing safe for their own selves and partly out of bitterness against the female gender that is refusing to dance to their tunes anymore, are now marginalising women in terms of employment. And believe me, in India it’s happening as much if not more in corporate offices too. In rare cases, it’s also true that women are getting even due to personal enmity and crying foul when they haven’t actually been sexually harassed — that’s happening in media and entertainment in India quite a bit. But we have to live and fight all this too, for the solution is certainly not to brush things under the carpet. That is more debilitating for our souls and our identities than a temporary backlash from the men! Above all, we should learn to be the truly fair (as in just) sex, even when the men are not and we have to win the war even if we lose a few battles along the way.”

Male employers, in the name of playing safe for their own selves, are now marginalising women in terms of employment