Birthday celebrations, with changing times

Birthdays are special, so it is said. But are they? Is it not like any other day on the calendar? Perhaps the planets change on that day. Some naughty ones fall in line, while previously friendly ones decide to test you. Whatever it maybe, one thing is certain, things do take a turn. Whether it’s for better or worse, remains to be seen.

Earlier, there used to be a personal touch to wishing someone a happy birthday. It involved a personal visit and a carefully handpicked gift. The recipient of the gift would also be fully geared up with hot pakoras, cake and sweets.

Along came the good old telephone, and lengthy birthday wishes would follow. In small towns, where lines were few, telephone operators would be usually listening in and would gently remind the more descriptive talker about the value of time.

Then came the Facebook and Whatsapp era. The wishes are also virtual as are the cake and goodies. Let your imagination run riot, create the biggest bouquets with exotic flowers. Pick up the goodies from icon store. Pay attention to the birthday boy’s likes or dislikes and post the gift accordingly on his timeline. Everyone is happy, including your pocket.

Things are different when three generations are living under same roof. Planning for gifts starts about a fortnight before. As a child, my son would use his writing board to prepare a list of gifts he wanted with suitable names alongside to avoid confusion or duplication!

Planning the menu for any celebration, big or small, is important in all Punjabi homes. It can’t be taken lightly. A good amount of time is spent on discussing and debating the combinations. And then there is the ‘kuch meetha ho jaye’ part. While youngsters would not have anything but their favourite chocolate cake, no elderly worth his salt would settle for a cake, that too a chocolate cake! It had to be hot crisp jalebis. My son would ask his grandpa innocently, “So when is your jalebi wala birthday coming?” This question became a sweet memory, repeated every year even as both of them grew up in their own ways. Today, he is a smart young man and his grandpa has joined the Gods in heaven, and here I am sitting and remembering those beautiful moments of the “jalebi wala birthday”.

And if we go about 50 years ago, one interesting thing was that daughter’s birthdays were conveniently forgotten. On top of that if your birthday falls in summer, as does mine, you are left with even more low-key celebrations. Half the friends would be off to the hills and others to their grandparents as was the practice when we were children. But with shrinking families and not-so-warm relationships, this is now a rarity today. And pictures with old grandparents may not look as glamorous as a snapshot of an exotic destination on Facebook!

MY SON WOULD ASK HIS GRANDPA INNOCENTLY, “SO WHEN IS YOUR JALEBI WALA B’DAY COMING?” THIS QUESTION BECAME A SWEET MEMORY