Keep your big ego aside and apologise without delay

The other day my eight-year-old granddaughter accidentally broke my spectacles. She promptly said ‘sorry’, and disappeared to play with her friends in the garden. When we met again at dinner, I told her that an apology should be true and sincere, and not said just for the sake of it, as she had done earlier in the day.

The incident also made me think that in our daily lives we utter the word ‘sorry’ a number of times as a form of polite behaviour. But it is more perfunctory than meaningful. Worse still, we are not so forthcoming in apologising when our words and acts are of a grievously wounding nature.

What is it that prevents us from saying sorry when the issue is not trivial? It is our inflated ego. After an incident, we might, in hindsight, admit to ourselves that we had erred and should say ‘sorry’, but our egoistic self would expect the other person to make the first move.

Consequently, with the passage of time the damage to the relationship becomes virtually irreparable, as no attempt is made by either side to ‘forgive and forget’.

Hence, to save your relationship you must keep your ego aside and apologise without delay when an unsavoury incident happens. Without dilly-dallying, you should admit your mistake in all sincerity and humility. It may seem tempting, but never dilute an apology with an excuse, even if your words and acts were in retaliation.

Apologising for an incident does not mean you are wrong and the other person is right. It means you value your relationship with that person more than your ego.