No toying with sex or religion
Livein relationships and sex toys are frowned upon by a majority of young Indians. Many of them do not have friends from other religious communities and others look askance at intercaste marriages
Surbhi Badhauria, a 25-year Delhi-based digital marketer, speaks her mind. She has no qualms about holding forth on the availability of sex toys in India. Or rather, lack of them.
“Sex is absolutely healthy and important for the well-being of a human body (unless you are a yogi),” she quips.
“Sex toys will help singles live a less stressful life. I don’t think it is fair to get married or get into a relationship just for sexual satisfaction. These (toys) will stop people from treating others as sexual objects,” she adds.
Badhauria’s views, however, don’t reflect that of the majority. The Hindustan Times-MaRS Monitoring and Research Systems Youth Survey 2017 reveals that only 15% of the country’s youth, aged between 18 and 25, agree to the idea of making adult pleasure tools easily accessible in India.
Indian youth seem to be conservative when it comes to marriage and sex, according to the survey. Only 27% approve of premarital sex while 85% frown upon watching porn. And only 23% are comfortable with the idea of a live-in relationship without being married.
Prateek Sarpal, a 26-year-old entrepreneur from Delhi is ambiguous in his response when asked for his take on watching porn. “The answer to this question cannot be a simple yes or no. Watching porn can be a two-edged sword that could be good and bad at the same time,” he observes.
The important thing, Sarpal explains, “is to understand the kind of education one has about the topic. If one has the appropriate sex education, pornography can be a positive thing, but without sex education it can have a very negative effect.”
Mrinalini Arora, a 24-year-old company secretary based in Delhi does not mind being in a live-in relationship. “Cohabitation prior to marriage should be permitted. There is no pretence or false emotions in a live-in relationship. In India, if you talk about live-in, you’re presumed to be talking about plain sex and nothing more,” she claims.
About 52% of the respondents also say that they do not have friends outside their own religious community.
While tying the knot, almost 68% prefer religious rituals over court marriage. About 45.1% respondents say they will have no problems if their parents choose a bride or groom for them.
Around 60% people said they do not want inter-caste marriages. Such ties “become an issue when families get involved because they take into consideration kundli, (horoscopes) caste, status and related issues,” says Sarpal.
Author Natasha Badhwar says she is not surprised by the survey findings, particularly on the young generation’s thoughts on marriage. “Somehow, people’s education, exposure, lifestyle has not affected their idea of a dream marriage. They still want a filmy wedding with multiple events such as sangeet and mehendi. Part of it has to do with how films have portrayed the big fat Indian weddings,” she says.
“Moreover, marriage is considered not only about the alliance of two people. It is also about reunions, networking, and the aspirations of parents and grandparents in both the families,” she points out.
Sex is absolutely healthy and important for the wellbeing of the human body (unless you are a yogi) SURBHI BADHAURIA, Digital marketer If one has the appropriate sex education, pornography can be a positive thing, but without education it’s negative PRATEEK SARPAL, Entrepreneur Cohabitation prior to marriage should be permitted. There is no pretence in a livein relationship MRINALINI ARORA, Company secretary