LITTLE GESTURES, VEILED EMOTIONS

Physical or verbal show of emotions for one’s child is usually a challenging task for a father. Gandharv Walia explores the ways a father expresses his love for the child

Playing an immense role in one’s overall development, fathers, generally, abstain from the physical or verbal show of emotions for their children. Knowing the best for their child, they usually seem to be spending a lot of time in inculcating values and manners in a child. With this, the love for the child sometimes seems to take a backseat, which puts a wrong impression on the mind of the child. But every once a while, fathers do express love to their children, but in unique ways. “Men are usually socialised into not expressing their emotions with ease in the name of being ‘strong’. Traditionally, fathers find it hard to express their love, even to their children. They express love in the form of providing several commodities for the children,” said Dr. Megha Tulsiyan, Counselling Psychologist and Psychotherapist, Counselling Team, Inner Space.

Nowadays, be it a father or mother, both parents act as providers in families and also nurture the children, taking care of all their needs in growing up into well-groomed individuals. Fathers, who take active part in their children’s lives through several methods, tend to sow the seeds of a bright future for their kids. Be it in academics or extra-curricular activities, the children show improvement in overall conduct after fathers’ intervention.

The children, who grow up in the presence of their fathers, depict more stability in their emotional self and are confident and happier. These children also boast of more self-control. It is easier to live a goal directed life and avoid vulnerable decisions. Insecurity among children is common, who are brought up in a father’s absence.

USE CONVERSATIONS TO CONNECT

Usually men are not verbal in expressing love for children. They express their love towards their children through humour. They use conversations to connect with their children and make them laugh. They also narrate stories and make meaningful connections. They draw parallels and talk anecdotes. “Fathers also express their attachment towards their children by playing with them and doing different adventure activities. Using games optimally, they show love towards their children in a competitive streak. Some fathers also express their love towards their children by teaching them several subjects to help them score good in the academics. They also express their love by protecting their children and standing up for them. Overall, many fathers bond with their children in playful, humorous, educational and competitive ways. This is vital for the overall development of a child,” said Richa Khetawat, Family Counsellor.

TAKE UP SEVERAL ROLES

Whether, it is a single father family or nuclear families, where both parents are working, the fathers seem to be taking up both the roles of providing vital needs and nurturing the children for a bright future. Depending on nature, they are starting to get comfortable with showing their emotions in public also. Fathers express love in the form of a protective figure, which plays an important role in the upbringing of the child. When a father tells his child some inspiring words, such as ‘You can do it!’, ‘I am here’. It speaks volumes of his strength and the ability to protect the child in the emergency situations. They not just teach the children to fight hard in life but also overcome the fear of failure to achieve big goals.

FATHERS’ LOVE, CRUCIAL FOR CHILD

Father’s love is very important for the children as they need to be loved, wanted, appreciated and encouraged. Not just a mother, a lot also depends on the father as well. The fathers’ effort to show love is crucial for the children as they are vulnerable and can be nurtured only by the love they receive. “Most men are less talkative and expressive as compared to women. So, fathers usually show their silent support through their actions. Apart from playing with kids, fathers love to hold intellectual discussions over politics, sports, movies, etc, with their children. Some fathers also cook for their children, read books with them and even help spouses to show support for family. Fathers find joy in fulfilling the needs of the children,” said Dr Nisha Khanna, Family Counsellor.

INVALUABLE CONTRIBUTION

With broader and richer experience of life, fathers have a distinct style of communication. Their words many a time challenge children to push their limits and in turn encourage them to do wonders in all fields, be it sports, academics or work. They teach the children to become a risk taker, work hard and prepare children for real world.

Fathers, who are involved a lot with their children, go out of their way to make them feel needed. Fathers spend quality time with the children by carrying out different tasks together. Be it camping or carrying out household activities, every attempt solidifies the bond between a father and

FATHERS TRY TO SHOW THEIR LOVE BY SPENDING QUALITY TIME WITH CHILDREN. THEY FULFILL ALL REQUIREMENTS AND PROVIDE A STABLE HOME ENVIRONMENT TO THE CHILDREN. THE FATHERS AID CHILDREN IN GROWING UP AS SUCCESSFUL INDIVIDUALS.