It’s always better to promise little, and then do a lot

For a long time my daughter had been asking for a bicycle, so when we finally decided to buy her one, I broke the news expecting her to jump with excitement. But her reply stumped us. “Dad never says ‘no’ to any of my wishes, but neither does he fulfill them,” she said. Needless to say she didn’t believe the news and almost wanted a written confirmation.

As parents, we are guilty of not paying attention to the wishes of our children. In fact, to prevent them from pestering us, we casually say “yes” to whatever they want, without really meaning it and at times forget about it. Unfortunately, by taking this “escape route” we erode our credibility in the eyes of our children.

They refuse to take us on our word. They stop believing us. Some of us adopt the same approach with people outside, especially when a person comes to us hoping for a favour.

While we may give that person a patient hearing, we still are unable to say a polite “no”, despite completely understanding that the favour asked for will not and cannot be met.

We wrongly assume that a straightforward refusal would be rudeness. Consequently, we raise hopes when there aren’t any.

This approach does tremendous damage to our image . We are not taken at face value. So, we must be extremely wary that we are not holding out false promises and hopes to others, without being serious about fulfilling these.

It’s always better to promise little and then do much.