Living with hollowness of being human
Since childhood, we had been made to understand that seeing two magpies in the morning augured a good day ahead, whereas one was always unlucky; and we so deeply internalised the adage ‘One for sorrow, two for joy.’ As kids we followed it, just to feel good, or bad. But never had I thought this lighthearted maxim would hit me so hard one day.
This takes me back to an incident about four decades ago, when I was staying in a working women’s hostel. With the first light of dawn, two magpies would come and sit on the electric pole outside my verandah, chirping melodiously; making me jump out of my bed and rush outside to meet the ‘two for joy’ as the first thing in the morning. This pair of magpies seemed to know the axiom, for it would perch itself outside my room daily, heralding a new joyful day for me with their twittering. I would give them a thanksgiving smile, while they would share their happiness with a dance on the wire. This went on for quite some time, and a silent bond was established between us.
But one morning, the sound of the birds was not its usual chirpy self, but a shriek filled with terror, shock and beseeching. Confused, I rushed outside and was gobsmacked to see the scene there. One magpie was hanging with the electric wire, writhing and wriggling for life, while the other one was clamouring around its mate. Finding me there, it looked at me with entreating eyes, as if asking me to save its companion.
Shaken by the scene, I turned my face around with shock; my legs gave way and it became difficult for me to stand there anymore. The magpie flew down to the railing of my verandah and in heart-rending shrieks asked me to help it. With an ‘Oh... no!’ I rushed back to my room covering my eyes.
After some time, the shrieks stopped; the magpie hanging on the wire had died, and the other one, dumbfounded and thunderstruck, kept on fluttering around it.
The magpie never visited my verandah anymore. Perhaps, it had understood the hollowness of human relationships; it had found out that all human perception was egocentric; that man loved everything as long as it served his own purpose.
A long time has passed since this incident, but I cannot tell why I had turned my face away that day. Was it because I could not bear the suffering of the birds, or I was taken aback by ‘one for sorrow’? The truth will always remain buried in some unfathomable corner of my heart. But yes, I still feel guilty of not helping those innocent birds who had taken upon themselves to bring happiness for me every morning. I had disappointed them in their hour of need.
It is not possible for me to recognise that very magpie; I find them all the same. Moreover, I have changed the place long back. But I don’t have the strength to look into the eyes of any of them. This guilt will always remain with me.
IT HAD FOUND OUT THAT ALL HUMAN PERCEPTION WAS EGOCENTRIC; THAT MAN LOVED EVERYTHING AS LONG AS IT SERVED HIS OWN PURPOSE