Weeding out hurt, anger and bitterness
Ilook forward to our annual visit to our son in the US for various reasons. The first is to spend quality time with him and watch my grandchildren goof around as they step out of their toddler shoes. The other reasons, though trivial, add to the enjoyment and pleasure of our stay there.
In my last trip, I experienced the delight of the fall season when the leaves are a riot of colour, and as the trees shed them they carpet the area bright. In this trip, I wanted to try my hand at gardening. My knowledge of the subject is close to nil and green fingers, what are those? I tried to apprise myself of certain plants that grow there, and the procedure to make them flourish.
The first step obviously is preparing the bed. That was challenge number one. I selected a patch of a suitable size, but when I went up close, I looked at it quite ruefully. It was filled with a lot of greenery, some plants and a lot of weeds. The problem was I could not differentiate between the two. I got some help and guidance from the neighbours.
Any novel activity gives me a feeling of elation and weeding that day was truly pleasurable. As I was painstakingly pulling out the weeds, I noticed a rolypoly brown cub that resembled a baby bear but was a ground hog that abounds those areas, watching me from a distance curiously. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw squirrels scuttling up and down the trees around the periphery of the backyard. Not so far away, I noticed two deer, walking and gracefully moving their necks as though in conversation.
The silence was broken by the sounds of nature, the breeze caressing the leaves and birds chirping on the boughs of the trees. There were no human sounds, a strange phenomenon for those of us who reside in India. It can be disconcerting and well, almost deafening.
Calm descended and I felt in tune with the environment. As I continued my task, I felt a strange stillness and a meditative mood, which was soothing and profound, an experience hard to describe and rare to come by. I began to internalise and think how wonderful it could be if we could weed out all negative experiences and memories, the hurt and the resentment, the anger and the bitterness from our minds.
All of us suffer from that in some degree, quite often a result of miscommunication, wrong perception, misunderstandings; totally unnecessary and absolutely avoidable. Why wallow in the past when the present is so beautiful and the future what we make of it?
As American mental health activist Dorothea Dix put it, “Your minds may now be likened to a garden, which will, if neglected, yield only weeds and thistles; but, if cultivated, will produce the most beautiful flowers, and the most delicious fruits.”
I FELT A STRANGE STILLNESS, WHICH WAS SOOTHING AND PROFOUND, AN EXPERIENCE HARD TO DESCRIBE AND RARE TO COME BY