PREPARE KIDS TO PERCEIVE THE THREAT, SAY MOMS
Mothers concerned about safety of daughters feel right parenting and open dialogue at home can prepare children to fight back in times of need. They also advocate strong implementation of laws to check crimes against women.
With reports of crime against women and even children hogging newspaper headlines practically every day, mothers are worried about the safety of their daughters. They feel right parenting and allowing an open dialogue at home can prepare children to perceive the threat and also to fight it back in times of need. During a forum at HT office on Thursday, mothers gave a number of suggestions to help create a better and safer environment for their daughters. One of them even suggested using Aadhar cads to debar offender from all facilities.
LUCKNOW: With reports of crime against women and even children hogging newspaper headlines practically every day, mothers in the city are worried about the safety of their daughters. They feel right parenting and allowing an open dialogue at home can prepare children to perceive the threat and also to fight it back in times of need.
During a forum at Hindustan Times office on Thursday, mothers gave a number of suggestions to help create a better and safer environment for their daughters.
Shalie Malik, assistant professor in Lucknow university and mother of an eight-year -old said, “As a working mother, it is my duty to spare a good amount of time for my daughter. I may do wonders as a professional but I would fail if I don’t do justice to my duties as a mother.”
Emphasising on sparing time for children, Malik suggested that parents should build a bond of trust with their children so that the children don’t hesitate in sharing their problems with them.
Simran Sahni, an entrepreneur and mother of teenage children, emphasised on open discussions. She said, “We don’t just need to limit our teachings and discussions to children. Such issues need to be discussed openly in the family and with friends as well if we wish to bring about a change.”
Talking about the debate of what to wear and what not to wear, Simran said, “We need to teach our children and also understand what to do where. We also need to teach them that life is not a bed of roses and they should be prepared to face the harsh realities .”
She also focused on teaching children to be courageous.
Ministhy S, a bureaucrat and mother of two daughters, suggested changes in the system.
She said, “There should be continuous training programmes at all levels to build sensitivity in officials. During promotions, the sensitivity of the officials should also be taken into consideration. Only this can propel them to work for the weakest of the weak. We should not hesitate to tell our boys that if they watch porn or think dirty about other girls, there may be someone thinking in a similar way about their sister. That’s how sensitisation should begin from home.”
The panellists lamented the negative role of mothers in several cases of sexual abuse. A number of cases have highlighted that when the girl complained of sexual abuse by a near and dear one in the initial stage, they were suppressed by their mothers.
Aashrita Dass, principal of La Martiniere Girls’ College and mother of a daughter emphasised on the need to make women financially independent. “Only if the mothers are financially independent can they take a bold step. An independent women would not be afraid to stand by her girl and fight for her rights.”
The panellists also emphasised on strong implementation of laws in the country to check crimes against women. Amrita Chakraborty, lawyer and activist said, “Law cannot prevent crimes. It is only remedial, compensative and punitive machinery. We have to break the taboo of victim shaming and silencing. Speedy, affordable and child -friendly redressal system and exemplary punishments would definitely bring about some positive changes. Unless and until financial, moral and educational prosperity reaches every strata of our society we won’t be able to protect our children from crimes and injustices.”
Charmaine Fanthome Beecham, director, St Teresa’s Schools and Colleges, emphasised on the effective implementation of the POCSO Act that is meant to check sexual crimes against minors.
Fatima Rizvi, faculty, department of English and Modern European Languages, Lucknow University, focussed on giving lessons of morality to people in power. She said, “There have been so many cases where people in power try to protect the misdeeds of their children. This needs to be checked.”
Anshu Bhatnagar, a social worker, suggested that women judges be appointed and only fast track courts should be allowed to deal with cases of crimes against women.
Aarti Kumar, who works for mother and child health, suggested, “We teach our girls modesty. We need to teach them courage.”