Time to restore the sanctity of marriage

It is true that marriages are made in heaven and solemnised on earth. However, there are so many varieties of marriage ceremonies that each one becomes an extraordinary event to be remembered for life. Different religions and regions have their own customs. It is a joy to see all those elaborate ceremonies. Some of these rituals have deep meaning and some have been added over time.

When my daughter decided to get married, the groom she chose was a Hindu. We are devout Sikhs but I had no objection to the marriage as it was her choice. The relatives of the groom came to our house to discuss the ceremony. We thought it would be great to hold a Hindu wedding at night and Anand Karaj in the morning. My daughter and son-in-law left the room for a few minutes and then returned to declare, “We think God is one. Why should we take our vows two times? We want this ceremony to be pious and simple. So we have decided to go for a court marriage.”

Initially, the families were not happy with their decision but ultimately everyone agreed. The couple submitted the required documents in court and got a suitable date. Three witnesses from the bride’s side and three from the groom’s accompanied the couple to the courtroom. It was a long list that day. Three couples were already sitting before us. They were all decked up in wedding finery.

The court marriage ceremony was part funny and part unique. When our turn came, the court orderly announced the name of the bride and the groom. The witnesses too were called inside. The judge was sitting on one side of the room behind a table. In sync with the digital age, the clerk was equipped with a computer and camera. All formalities were completed in five minutes after which the couple was asked to sit on two ceremonial chairs in the hall for a photo op with the families.

The judge, who appeared to have a sense of humour, dictated every step. “Wear the garlands; bride and groom to sit closer. Family photo lo. Kaam khatam. Ab bhago (It’s over, now scoot).”

All of us had a hearty laugh when we stepped out. There were many more couples lined up after us. There was a restaurant near the court that offered buffet lunch. When we reached there, we saw all the couples who were ahead of us having lunch.

As we came home, I could not help but compare this simple affair with the big fat Indian weddings that we hold these days. The main idea of marriage is to bring two people together to live happily ever after. It is also an occasion for two families to get to know each other. However, the aim of this celebration is getting buried under elaborate arrangements, boring rituals, lavish expenditure and the race to be one up on the neighbours.

Let us simplify things to restore the sanctity of marriage, and in today’s changing times, court marriage is a good idea.

IT WAS A LONG LIST THAT DAY. THREE COUPLES WERE ALREADY SITTING BEFORE US. THEY WERE ALL DECKED UP IN WEDDING FINERY. THE COURT MARRIAGE WAS PART FUNNY AND PART UNIQUE