It’s time to revise your dating lingo, from benching to DTR
Gone are the days when you would say you are crushing on someone, single or committed — now you could be breadcrumbing, benching, ghosting or even haunting. Confused, right? So were we. But here’s a guide to help you get a hang of the modern dating terms.
This one has been around for quite a while but for those who don’t know, bae is Before Anyone Else. People often use the term romantically, but anyone could be your bae – your best friend, pet, or your food (Bacon and eggs, anyone?).
Remember all the flirty messages in your Instagram or Facebook inbox from people you don’t know? What they’re doing is called sliding. Sliding into your inbox, and, if they’re lucky enough, into your lives. This is people making the best use of technology.
This one’s simple — think of them being flaky towards you. If someone who makes you feel like love could blossom, but they refuse to commit, they’re breadcrumbing on you. It is all the flirty messages never leading up to anything.
This one’s a little like sports team reserves — you get put on the ‘bench’ when there are other options available. So if you haven’t had the talk yet about your relationship status, you could totally be benched.
DTR - DEFINE THE RELATIONSHIP
You guys are hooking up or dating... but you don’t know what exactly the status is. Are you guys casual or serious? Are you exclusive? This is when you need to DTR – define the relationship. It may seem scary but who wants mind games and mixed signals?
This is where you end contact without any heads up, texts or talks whatsoever. You could be doing this to a friend, to a potential love, or your bae. People usually resort to ghosting when they want to avoid giving an explanation or drama — that is not to say that it is right to do so.
Think of this like a monkey swinging from one branch to another without stopping. Those who jump from one relationship to another without giving any breaks in between are said to be monkeying. It could be a rebound situation, a broken heart, commitment issues or the fear of being lonely that could lead a person to indulge in back-to-back relationships.
We’re all guilty of it. When you decide you don’t want someone in your life, and you start distancing yourself slowly, it’s called slow fading. This could be delayed replies to your texts, gentle refusals to go out on dates, and far and fewer phone calls. While the slow faders think they’re being gentle and considerate, this is never easy on the one who is being given the fading treatment.