‘Call me a chef, not lesbian chef. I’m not a criminal’
are doing something different and, of course, there’s the law.
In the eyes of the law, I am a criminal and that is unacceptable.
According to the Indian Penal Code, people like me are guilty of “unnatural offences”. The law book, left behind by the British, tries to govern our lives through Section 377 and can imprison us for a term of life for “carnal intercourse against the order of nature with any man, woman or animal”.
I am many things but I am not a criminal, and a coward I am not. I am a celebrated chef with seven restaurants around the world. I want to be known as a chef; not as a lesbian chef.
I have never been in the closet but I don’t feel the need to wear a T-shirt announcing my sexuality. My family and friends, who matter, know me for what I am. After a four-year stint in London, I returned to Delhi and decided to speak to my parents. My mother just went silent. Two days later, she sent a box of mangoes to my partner.
I am not an activist and have no desire to be one but I have now signed a petition seeking a review of a colonialera law that criminalises consensual same-sex-relations between adults. I now believe none of us has the right to expect a change without doing our bit to bring about that change. A few years ago, I joined the gay pride in Delhi.
I have never been ashamed of my orientation, but now can’t bear the ways in which members from my community are discriminated against. The freedom to love is not just about sexuality, but how do you begin to explain that? We become vulnerable to blackmail and extortion by the police and even by domestic helps or drivers. The horrific section called 377 is used as a tool to scare and intimidate. What I do within my home should be my business. I am a worthy, tax-paying citizen like the rest of you.
I was disturbed when two young girls who fell in love were arrested and one was raped by villagers who thought the extreme act of sexual assault would “cure” her. How can love between two human beings be a criminal act?
Frankly, I don’t even care about acceptance but how dare you label me a criminal? The truth is that I live in New Delhi, am financially independent and fairly well-known. All these help protect me but one only has to visit smaller cities, or go to villages to find out more about discrimination. I’ll also say that it’s not only about class and money; it is also about the environment. Imagine a mindset in which girls are raped in the belief that they’ll become straight.
I was cautioned about signing the petition. I was told that it would have repercussions on my daily life, but I have to do my bit. We are not asking to be treated as a minority; we’re not asking for quotas and reservations; only dignity and privacy to be who we are.
I realised I’m also putting my family and friends in the limelight. One of my relatives actually asked my mother if my partner and I were sleeping in the same bed. I was prepared to be beaten by a conservative woman like my mother, for her to be crying, but she stands by me like a rock. When I broke up with my partner, she was worried that her daughter would be lonely.
I have had several messages since I signed the petition, calling me a pervert, asking me to go to an ashram etc but I have had more than double the number of texts appreciating the stand that I have taken.
Homosexuality is not a crime. It has been part of our texts and our temples. Our mythology is full of it. The Victorians came and changed it and the law criminalising it needs to change too.
I am mighty proud of myself. I am a businesswoman, not an activist. Yes, let’s talk about 377.
A Delhi-based non-governmental organisation, Naz Foundation, files a public interest litigation in the Delhi high court challenging section 377
September: High court dismisses the PIL, saying Naz Foundation has no locus standi in the case
December: Activists approach the Supreme Court against the order of the Delhi high court.
April: The top court directs the high court to reconsider the matter on merit.
September: Centre seeks more time to take stand after contradictory statements by home ministry, which backs Section 377 and health ministry, which admits law is hampering fight against HIV/AIDS. Later that month, Centre says “gay sex” is immoral.
October: High court pulls up the Centre for relying on religious texts and asks it to come up with a stand based on scientific reports.
July: High court strikes down Section 377 which criminalises consensual sexual acts between adults in private
December: Supreme Court sets aside the 2009 Delhi high court order, asks Parliament to come up with law.
January: Supreme Court dismisses a central government petition seeking a review of its verdict
January: Supreme Court agrees to hear curative petition, last available judicial recourse, in open court
June: Supreme Court refers a petition filed by five well-known members of the LGBT community to the Chief Justice for “appropriate orders”.
August: Supreme Court passes landmark ruling declaring individual privacy a guaranteed fundamental right and calling sexual orientation an “essential attribute” of privacy.
January: Supreme Court refers Section 377 to a larger bench of the court, saying its 2013 decision requires reconsideration.
SPEAKING UP Wellknown restaurateur has petitioned the Supreme Court asking for the archaic law to be decriminalised. It impinges on dignity and privacy, she argues I WAS DISTURBED WHEN TWO YOUNG GIRLS WHO FELL IN LOVE WERE ARRESTED AND ONE WAS RAPED BY VILLAGERS WHO THOUGHT THE EXTREME ACT OF SEXUAL ASSAULT WOULD ‘CURE’ HER