Patel ‘saas-bahus’ make peace pact
As the epicentre of the Patidar agitation for quotas, Rajkot has been roiled by massive protests over the past two years. But last week, the city saw a very different gathering: Thousands of women dressed in red pledging bonhomie between mothers-inlaw and daughters-in-law.
The 30,000-strong crowd, according to police, comprised of women from the Kadva Patel community, which forms around a third of the influential Patidar community and the faction to which Hardik Patel belongs to.
The women resolved to ease differences among them and keep their houses in order under the slogan ‘Ek Bija Ne Gamta Rahiye’ (Let’s Keep Liking Each Other).
“The peace pact is a win-win situation for both saas (motherin-law) and bahu (daughter-inlaw). It not only helps the bahu get the respect and rights she is entitled to, but also ensures that the saas won’t have to spend the last stage of her life in an old-age home,” said Vijyaben Patel, president of the Patel Seva Samaj (Women Wing). She attended the event with her daughter-in-law Kinjal. “When the mother-in-law is by her side, a woman feels the strongest at home as well as in society. This helps her take on any challenge life throws her way,” added Kinjal.
Hoping that mutual respect and affection between mothersin-law and daughters-in-law can help address evils like dowry, harassment and female foeticide, Patidar women sat through sessions by prominent writers such as Jay Vasavda and government officials including the head of Abhayam — a government-run women’s helpline.
The event on January 29 assumes significance because state government data shows that strife between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is responsible for at least 25% of all domestic violence cases registered.
The women have now decided to take the message forward. “After the gathering, we launched Samadhan Manch (redressal forum) by the women wing. The cell will meet twice a month where saas and bahu or husband and wife can come with their issues...” said Vijyaben.
Manish Changela, who conceptualised the event, said they always knew one such meet “is never enough”.
“What is important that women from well to do families in Rajkot participated, indicating acknowledgment of the issue and willingness to address it by coming out in the open. The problem intensifies when influential families try to keep the matter under wraps,” said Changela.
The community, known for its political clout, is trying to keep the drive a purely social programme.
“There shouldn’t be any religious or political tone to it ... At Rajkot, except for speakers, no community, religious or political leader was present on the stage,” Changela said.
AHMEDABAD: