Head

as something to be shared?

But failure? Oh no. You fly solo. I think it’s a huge mistake. When you fail is when you need someone the most. It is the period that is your darkest. When you feel most wretched. Most alone. Failure isolates you... sometimes from yourself. You wonder, “Is that loser really me?” You try and create a distance from that part of your life and pretend it never happened. Or that it happened through no fault of yours. Failure always seeks alibis. “I would have won... had that person lost.” Failure feeds insecurity like nothing else. Failure often begins at birth. You are female. That’s enough. You are not wanted. You have failed your family. Oops! Wrong gender. Now what?

Aha. That ‘Now what’ is very important.

Never underestimate the power of those two words. Now is when your time begins. Again. Now is when you pick yourself up – and like the Johnnie Walker ad advises – keep walking. Now is when you don’t surrender. Don’t give up. Now is the time to say: Next!

I have tried hard to focus on ‘Next’ each time I have tripped and gone for a toss. Like when I passed with a third division (Senior Cambridge), unable to conquer the twin demons of physics and higher mathematics. Or when my first marriage didn’t work out. But hey... I am here. I am writing these lines. I guess I am okay. I just shouted ‘Failure’ at the ceiling – and didn’t feel scared.