‘I AM NOT THREE ANYMORE’

CHILDREN GROW UP, MOTHERS ARE ALWAYS MOTHERS, WRITES THE ACTOR

My son is not three anymore This information was imparted to me by my very grown up son (he is 17, while my older son is 18) as I kissed and hugged him while I was waking him up

Of course you are not three, my darling

You can’t be and it’s my loss If you were three, you’d have searched for the crook of my neck before you opened your eyes

You would have snuggled into my embrace, lingering in sleep a little longer as you clung to me

If you were three, you’d have begged me to lie down with you and woken up to my kisses

You would have raised your arms and waited for me to pick you up

You would have replied to my ‘good morning’ with your eyes closed and a delicate smile, in a mumble of gurgles and broken words that only I understood

If you were three you would have asked me to brush your teeth and giggled as I shampooed your soft hair

You would have relied on me to choose your clothes and then worn them with pride

If you were three, you would have held on to my dress, following me around as I cooked breakfast for you

Of course you aren’t three, my love, because if you were you would have insisted I feed you with a story I made up along the way, which you would listen to wide-eyed in a rapturous silence punctuated with chuckles

Your wounds could’ve been healed with my kisses Your fears banished by my hugs At three, you would have felt safest in my arms

If you were three, you would climb into my lap, showering me with kisses without an occasion to commemorate

If you were three, you would have stood outside the bathroom door as I showered and waited impatiently till I got out to hold you again

If you were three, your life would revolve around me, my baby The way mine will always revolve around you

Yes, you are not a three-yearold anymore

But you will always be my baby

No matter how old you get, whether you are three or thirteen or 30

While I will always be the mother who has not grown up since the hour you were born

PS Everyday in the smallest of ways I’m reminded what I choose to overlook My babies grew up too fast And I was reminded of it by my younger son in this instance as well I wrote this not for him to read, I wrote it for myself to accept

[ MOTHER’S DAY SPECIAL ]

“I WILL ALWAYS BE THE MOTHER WHO HAS NOT GROWN UP SINCE THE

HOUR YOU WERE BORN”

Shefali Shah with her two boys, Aryaman and Maurya when they were 18 months and six months old respectively (left), and when they were 15 and 14 years old