‘I FEEL BRUISED, BUT ALSO SOLID’
Filmmaker Sanjay Leela Bhansali feels like he is the “God’s chosen one” as he goes through difficult times. But feels the almighty gives him strength and listens to his prayers
By now, it’s well known that Padmaavat features a number of brilliantly-crafted war sequences. But even when film-maker Sanjay Leela Bhansali was designing such larger-than-life shots for his film, he was fighting like a valiant warrior off screen to ensure that his new creation reaches theatres beating all controversies, violence and threats. “Ultimately, what’s important is to successfully complete the climb,” says Bhansali, as he talks about Padmaavat, controversies, and completing 25 years in the industry.
At this stage, how relieved and content are you?
I feel extremely good. When you fight a battle for a yearand-a half, it’s a really long time. It’s not something that you think anybody would go through to create a film in any part of the world. It was my biggest test but my commitment to the film was resolute. In such situations, you are always thinking, ‘Should I give up, or stand up and fight? Amidst all the fear, angst and humiliation, how do you sustain a fight for one-anda half years?’ It took all of my 24 years’ experience — from 1942: A Love Story (1994) to now — and the fact that I loved this film to get it through. It is like climbing the Himalayas. There will be storms and avalanches, but it’s a part of it [the journey].
What gave you the strength to not get bogged down by whatever was happening around you?
If you love something more than yourself in life, then it doesn’t matter. I don’t know anything else. I don’t know how to use a computer, how to drive, or even to change batteries. I only know how to make a film. That is one thing that I live and die for. I don’t want money or fame. It all felt like someone was attacking my child and I was just nurturing my film. Come what may, I was going to give my everything for this film and not let anyone affect what I wanted to do.
You have had the story of Padmaavat with you for a long time. Are you relieved that it is finally out there?
I have a list of films out of which I have ticked out four, and I was planning them over the years. There are more to come and all of them are very ambitious and difficult. I have anyway always made difficult films and never taken a shortcut. On paper, a film may seem impossible but if you have the conviction then it cuts across. The conviction and the madness with which you make a film are important. The only thing that makes me unhappy is that the film was always planned as a film to show the glory and valour of Rajasthan, but it hasn’t yet released in that state.
You have completed almost 25 years in the industry now. How do you look back at your journey?
I hope they don’t give me a lifetime achievement award (laughs). It’s been tough for me. I have not been given even one day’s respite. All these years, I have just slogged, fought through, and it’s been like climbing up a straight mountain. It has been very tiring, adventurous, but also great fun. I have had beautiful experiences in the industry and have met great people over the years. In fact, I have also accepted some of the disagreements over my work very nicely (smiles).
And you have always worked on your own terms…
I have done all that I wanted to and have done it my way without compromising or being part of any camp. I was always a loner, who worked hard and did what I had to do. There have been some energies, creative angels or guardian angels watching over me. Now, I experience an amazing power that I always felt through all these years of making films which in itself seemed so difficult and impossible. For a person who wouldn’t talk — Vinod Chopra taught me how to talk — to reach this stage and make Padmaavat, has been a great learning process. I have been through so much and am ready to go through even more in my next phase.
I have not been given even one day’s respite. All these years, I have just slogged, fought through, and it’s been like climbing up a straight mountain. It has been adventurous. SANJAY LEELA BHANSALI, FILMMAKER
How challenging has the last oneandahalf year been?
Yes, I fought for one-and-a half year but not let it show on the screen. I had to keep the morale of the actors and the unit going; and that I am as committed. I think it was a great fight that I put up in my mind and I give myself full marks for the fact that I stood up to that test. Everyone struggles in their own way, but this one was a little difficult as the scale was huge. I feel good and relieved that the film has reached theatres. Especially, the battle of the last four months —when I was busy with post production — took a physical toll on me. It has made me a wiser and stronger man. It has evolved me as a person. Now, I feel exhausted but I’ve not stopped smiling.
As the captain of the ship, were you mindful of the fact that you always have to be rock solid as everyone was looking up to you?
You know, as soon as I enter the set, I am a child. It’s like going to a play school and having toys to play around . I would forget that there were at least 50 policemen around me. As soon I had script in hand, I forgot all of that. I wouldn’t even realise that I was facing so many threats; and fears. None of my actors also brought up the issues that were happening outside. But, yes, as soon as I would leave the set, I would think about everyone’s safety. I guess every film has its own destiny. However, everyone, including my team, digged deep and the results are spectacular.
But it’s easier said than done…
I feel in difficult times if you find excellence, you have really found it. It teaches you a lot; you become richer, stronger and a better human being. I feel I am all iron and steel (smiles). I guess I am God’s chosen one. He chooses me to go through all of that but also gives me strength and listens to my prayers. I feel there is also some divine intervention. I feel it all comes through the blessings of my father and his energies protect and take care of things around me. I am too normal and average a person to endure and survive it. I am also finding out the strange mysteries of life about what prayers can do. I feel battered and bruised, but am still standing firm and solid. The smile is not going anywhere.
Not just Padmaavat, you have had many stories with you for years. What made you choose Padmaavat now?
I felt I was ready to make it. There’s always time for a film. You just can’t get up one day and say I want to make a film. You have to be emotionally, physically and financially ready and somebody has to be ready to put that much money in and believe that you have the capability to make it. There is an inner calling for everything. It’s all about right time and destiny as it is simply God-chosen. Also, people are ready to watch certain films at a certain time. So, Padmaavat was to be made now, but I think I made Guzaarish a little too early. Just like the film-maker and the world, the audience also keeps evolving. I felt Khamoshi: The Musical also happened a bit early.
Do you feel vindicated with audiences going into the theatres in huge numbers?
They started going to theatres at a time when there was fear around as nobody knew what would happen on the first day. Any art – film, painting or music – ceases to exist without audience. So, for me the audience is really important. They have to connect and see the film. They have given me a place in their heart but you make that place only after years of hard work and realising that you have found your signature and your way of telling a story. Then, people know what to expect out of you. There have been filmmakers whose first films have been great but then they lose their audience. You have to stand the test of time and have to go through the grind.
You also got a lot of support from all the quarters…
Yes, I am grateful to the CBFC chief, Prasoon Joshi for passing the film with the required modifications, and to the police for protecting the theatres playing the film, to the press, and finally the members of my fraternity who have come forward to stand by me during the trying period.
Over years, you have become a brand of sorts. Are you aware?
The other day someone said, ‘I hope you know that you have become such a big brand.’ But my answer was, ‘what is a brand? Am I soap or cologne (laughs)?’ The idea is simple: if I make good films, people will like me but if I don’t, they won’t. Every day when I go for a shoot, I am always like, ‘how will I shoot this?’ I am a nervous wreck on a daily basis and that’s why, when I finish being in a film, my body completely gives up. It is like a game of cricket, so you may have hit one ball for a six but what do you with the next one?
What’s your process like? Do you still feel nervous?
I will never be a confident filmmaker who will say, ‘I know it all’ because I am constantly discovering, improvising and exploring on the set. I do different things on the set. As a director, in my mind, I am in a very great space. I prepare in advance only as much that I have to. When actors are in their costumes or when they sing their lines, I always try something new. When you do that, the scene gets a lot of value. Nerves are important as you need to get stimulated not by external stimulants which many people indulge in, but they have to be your nerves and grit. Your search for excellence is what you keep going for. My last success does not mean that I am going to get the next one right.
Talking of Padmaavat, was the final cast always on your mind?
I worked a lot on the casting of this film. Finally, it’s a matter of trusting the man (the filmmaker) who knows you far more than anyone else as an actor. I love Ranveer and he understands me. I have worked with him in three films so he was very important for the film. Ranveer and Deepika have become a habit to me. I love them and have had great joy of having created great characters in three films, which I will always be proud of. Be it Ram Leela, Bajirao Mastani or Padmaavat, I am happy that Ranveer and Deepika have got hits after their other unsuccessful films. As for Shahid, he was new for me, as I worked with him for the first time, so I had to find my energies and timing with him. He is a wonderful kid.
Are you over Padmaavat now?
No, I am still living and enjoying it. Every day when I go home, I remember and redo the lines of the whole film with all the shots in my mind and I don’t think I will stop doing it. After dinner, I go to my terrace and keep walking up and down recollecting the whole film. It’s something that I enjoy recollecting. I have watched this film of mine more than any of my films. And I am not yet done seeing it and have discovered so many new things every time I watch it. I will still watch this film for the whole month I think (laughs).
Finally, what’s your state of mind at this juncture?
I would have liked a little more love. But I think the less I get, the more hard I work and more I crave for it. So, I feel that in a way, the lesser the love I get, the better the filmmaker I will become.