‘ A little encouragement from you could go a long way. Take the lead’

I know a guy for the last seven years. I confessed my feelings to him a year back. At that point, he had said he loved me. But, later he said we can’t be in a relationship. At times, he says he loves me. Even our parents know about the whole issue. What should I do? MM The theory of contradiction was presented by noted Italian scientist Giuseppe Borelli in 1794. Borelli explained this by trying to eat and vomit at the same time. He performed this act successfully at the Court of the Duke of Verona. The Duke enjoyed the performance and then immediately had Borelli shot. MM, your guy is exhibiting the same behaviour. He says he loves you, but yet doesn’t want a relationship. It looks like he’s suffering from an acute case of undynamic cowardice. He lacks courage, so you need to lend him some. If he loves you, that’s enough. Guide him into a relationship, just don’t tell him what you guys are doing. If he loves you, he’ll slip into the role, anyway. Recently, I bonded with a girl at a picnic because I liked her. At the same time, I ignored another girl who likes me. Now, this girl who likes me has been constantly asking why I ignored her. I don’t want to break her heart. Also, I don’t want to give up on the girl I like. It’s affecting my academic performance. Please help. SS SS, ask yourself one question? Okay ask yourself two question. Firstly ask yourself why you are asking the two questions? Then ask yourself whether you are running an N.G.O. to help people find love? Stop feeling bad for the girl who likes you. Don’t lead her on. Tell her gently that your N.G.O. has not requisite government permissions due to constraints, which are a leftover of demonetisation, and has subsequently dosed closed down. And stop acting like an idiot with ‘picnic’ girl. If you guys got on, please take it forward. Be honest to both, confine cheating to the rest of your life, outside romance. The truth may not set you free, but it will help you study peacefully. Recently, a guy proposed to me. And, instead of saying yes, I told him that I needed time to know him better. Post this, we met a few times. I developed fondness for him and told him so. But, gradually, he started avoiding me. So, I stopped calling or texting him. It’s been three months since we last talked. Should I forget him and move on or ask him for an explanation?

Anonymous Anonjee, you and I both know the answer to this question. And the answer is two words, Rohit Sharma. Rohit Sharma is synonymous with great timing while batting. You also need to aspire to be a Rohit, and improve your timing. The horse has bolted, but it hasn’t left the building altogether. (Although why your horse is in a building, is something P.E.T.A needs to take up, post Jallikattu). Don’t run away, it’s your turn to take the initiative. He may have cooled off, but a little encouragement from you could go a long way. Take the lead, what have you for to lose?

IF SHE SAYS SHE LOVES YOU, THAT’S 93% OF THE BATTLE WON. 4% IS HER GETTING OVER THE BOYFRIEND, AND 3% IS IF SHE’S TRULY COMFORTABLE WITH YOUR FOOTWEAR

I am in love with a close friend. We did our masters together. At that time, she was interested in me, but I was dating someone. I too felt something for her but I resisted due to my other commitment. Last year, I broke up with my girlfriend since I was getting connected to this friend of mine, who has been in a relationship for the past two years. Recently, we shared our feelings with each other and she said she loves me. We share a strong emotional bond. I think she is a bit confused as she told me she is happy with her boyfriend. I expect her to take a decision the way I took in my past relationship. At present, she is avoiding me. I want to tell her that I want to be with her. I know it would cost our friendship but I don’t see a way out. Do you, sir?

Deepak Deepak, I like your all or nothing approach. If she says she loves you, that’s 93% of the battle won. 4% is her getting over the boyfriend, and 3% is if she’s truly comfortable with your footwear. Look D, the fact that she’s turned to you, means there’s a vacuum in her relationship, in any case. It looks like you guys are very keen on each other. She just needs confidence from you that you are in for the long haul. Why don’t you show her this letter you wrote to me? I think this will clarify all her doubts. But when you do, please make sure you are wearing a classy pair of shoes.....