BATTLING THE SHAME, STIGMA, OF BEING SINGLE
A book on single women has evolved into a digital chat show
Motherhood must be a voluntary choice. No vilification can insult motherhood, not even single motherhood. MONA AMBEGAONKAR Actor-activist
Little did author Sreemoyee Piu Kundu know what the future held when she wrote her non-fiction debut, Status Single (2017) — a narrative that draws from the daily struggles of being single, of more than 3,000 urban Indian women. “It was a seminal work of female identity, and once the book appeared, a community organically flowered around it. That led to the creation of an online community, Status Single, on Facebook,” recalls Kundu.
Single women gradually started connecting with her, and it developed into a work that had “critical” conversations, especially in the lockdown. It prompted her to start a fortnightly digital chat show, Status Single with Shree, by and for single women. “There were so many issues single women faced — housing discrimination, mental health, financial struggles. There’s still stigma associated with being single,” she says.
“The first show was on the financial struggles faced by single women. And the next one saw first-generation single women entrepreneurs, and women artists in lockdown, and how they need to be helped,” adds the journalistturned-author.
Season two began with feminist-social activist Kamla Bhasin speaking on older single women and on being a single mother to a differently-abled child. And its stellar line-up includes actor-activist Mona Ambegaonkar, filmmaker Vinta Nanda, writer-activist Sreela Dasgupta, and several others.
Mona, a single unwed mother, says she will talk about the choice of being a single mother, and lack of roles for middle-aged actors. “The issue of stigmatising single women, whatever their motherhood or marital status, is a direct infringement of their rights. As for motherhood, it must be a voluntary choice,” she says. Nanda, who says she has over 10,000 chapters or maybe more to her life, is “looking forward to share everything said and unsaid”.
Another speaker, dancerchoreographer-activist Mallika Sarabhai hopes women find “courage” through these discussions. “Unlike most divorced women I actively promoted my children’s closeness to their father. We have balanced priorities with them. And I have kept to my truths in public life even when called all manner of hideous names. It can be done and I need other women to know that and have courage.”
I’m single for 30 years. Unlike most divorced women, I promoted my children’s closeness to their father. MALLIKA SARABHAI, Dancer-activist