Kalki to write debut book on motherhood struggles
Known for her acting prowess, Kalki Koechlin is now all set to turn into an author with her debut book — a graphic memoir on motherhood. In an exclusive chat, she tells us, “I don’t see this as a memoir of my life or a culmination in any way. It is a tiny beginning of a new territory. And the reason I wrote it is that we only hear about how wonderful this experience is — which of course it is — but there’s a whole plethora of physical and mental changes that take a lot out of a person.”
She has been a playwright in the past, but it was in her first trimester that the idea of writing a book took birth in her consciousness. “I started drawing cartoons of how horrible I was feeling because I was vomiting, had suddenly lost my sense of energy and self, couldn’t think straight or work properly,” says Koechlin, who has been part of films such as The Girl in Yellow Boots (2010) and Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara (2011).
But being alone after the delivery, in a Covid-stricken world, it became imperative for her to talk about the many challenges that mothers often face but rarely talk about. Koechlin confesses, “I suffered from postpartum depression. It shouldn’t be labelled as extreme exhaustion. If any human being is woken up every two hours, they are going to be depressed! Sleep deprivation is a form of torture. You’ve to go through such gruelling training and most of us are not warned or told how to prepare for it… Why are we not talking about it? My therapist and gynaecologist helped with certain coping mechanisms... but the mental load of going through this and not knowing if you are alone in it is huge. People must know it happens a lot more than it’s admitted.”
Furthermore, the urge to address the challenges of being a working mother made Koechlin, 37, pen down her thoughts. She says, “It’s very hard to balance the two and not suffer from ‘mom guilt’. If you spend too much time at home, you feel bad about your work, and if you spend too much time at work, you feel bad about your child… [making it difficult] to fully appreciate the good moments… And my way of dealing with it was by journaling it down, and eventually turning it into a book.”