No! That’s not equal­ity, It’s h change a nati

India Today - - WINNING -

You re­mem­ber in the be­gin­ning? In the be­gin­ning God made man. God made man in his own im­age. And then that was it. Mankind, hu­man­ity, woman. Man, man, man. What chance in Hell did we ever have? We were side­lined from the Big Bang. You re­mem­ber Drau­padi? Drau­padi mar­ried off to all five Pan­davas. She gar­landed only Ar­jun But they told her you got to marry all of us. Five hus­bands! That can’t be fun. God knows I have enough trou­ble with one.

Or what about Eve and the ap­ple? Blam­ing one woman for all mankind’s evil? Surya and Kunti, The Vir­gin Mary. Do you know Gaia? The God­dess Mother Earth, She’s the one we all tram­ple on. And re­mem­ber Aphrodite, God­dess of love and beauty. Lest we for­get, she was also The pa­tron of pros­ti­tut­ing. Perse­phone, She was less known. Raped by Hades She be­came Queen of the un­der­world. Not even god­desses were left alone. You might not know A’isha, She was one of the wives of Prophet Mo­ham­mad. She chal­lenged a Caliph for power It cre­ated quite a ruckus, It led to war in fact, All be­cause of one woman’s fuss, And so was born the tra­di­tion Is­lamic That women should not en­gage in any­thing politic. But of course they did, Thank God they did. Women have their ways, As some­body once put it. The Queen of Sheba, Em­press Theodora, Rabia al’ Basra, Cleopa­tra, The Vic­to­rian Era, The Mona Lisa The Suf­fragettes, Mar­i­lyn Mon­roe, The six­ties and burn­ing bras, The un­pop­u­lar Thatcher and our own Indira Et ce­tra et ce­tra and now here we are. Here we are, We’ve sur­vived this far, Thanks to se­duc­tion, per­haps some ma­nip­u­la­tion, But mostly thanks to Mother Na­ture and ovu­la­tion. Now look at all the queens and god­desses of his­tory, No prince came to the res­cue, No king ever went down on one knee, No de­ity was even that trust­wor­thy, Yet all we’ve been told since we were three, Are fairy­tales, ad­verts, and pretty sto­ries, Telling us to pray, hope, And wait to be saved. Here we are to­day. Here we are, On In­ter­na­tional Women’s Day, With some mi­nor dis­ap­point­ments, And a few lit­tle things to say. The woman in red, The girl in pink, The widow in white, The burqa in black, The colour of lip­stick, Viva Glam, Lady Dan­ger, Fresh Brew, Faux, Frenzy, Hot Gos­sip and Sweetie. Ram­blin, Siss, Crème Cup, Para­mount and Mod­esty. Fetish, Spice it up, Naked Paris, Honey Love and Odyssey. Ap­ply, line, smack, seal, pout, And you’re ready to go out. Ugh!!! Some­times I just want an over­sized T-shirt, boxer shorts, un­kempt hair and uni­brows. I want armpit hair long enough to plait I want a clean face with­out a trace of make-up.

RO­HIT CHAWLA

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