Feminism is… fierce
FATIMA SANA SHAIKH, 25; SANYA MALHOTRA, 25, ACTORS, MUMBAI
What is feminism?
Sanya For me, it’s being myself and doing what I like to do without any kind of a restriction. In life, I’ve always been able to.
Fatima Feminism means not judging women for the choices they make. A married woman is no less of a feminist than an unmarried one.
How different is your equation with male and female friends?
Sanya All of them play an important part in my life. I can discuss anything with my male friends too. There is no difference. There used to be. When I was a child, I used to have only girlfriends and hide things from my guy friends. Fatima I even talk about my periods. Sanya Yup. “I’m not in a good mood. I’m PMSing. Whatever”.
When you got hair cuts, built wrestler bodies, did you get the manly tag?
Sanya No. We actually looked very nice with muscles. I used to feel so powerful on the mat and while wrestling. I used to love watching wrestler videos. And nobody looks manly. Geeta (Phogat) doesn’t look manly at all. Even Babita (Phogat). They all look so beautiful. I know we associate muscles with men. But with us, it’s never come up.
Did the look affect you while auditioning later? In Bollywood, there’s that whole thing about being conventionally beautiful—long hair, thin, and tall.
Sanya True. And we’re nothing like that. Fatima I don’t know why it didn’t happen. Or how.
Sanya But sometimes people walking behind us would confuse us for boys. They would shove us and walk by. Then they would turn back and say sorry.
Fatima And I think I like that. They aren’t eve teasing us because they think we’re one of them.
That is equality then?
Fatima That is equality. Basically they treat everyone as badly as each other.
Did you ever have body image issues before or after the film?
Sanya So pre Dangal when I was doing advertisements, I was really healthy. Very chubby. Not fit at all. I would eat pizza daily. I’m not an insecure person. I would always think ‘oh, I’m looking nice’. Now that I’ve lost weight and I’m fit, I’m more conscious. But it doesn’t overpower. I’m not so insecure that I’d just sit at home.
Fatima I grew up among boys, I would hang around with my brother and his friends. So I didn’t want to look like a girl. I would hide my chest. I would wear a lot of layers and tie something to look flat. I didn’t want breasts. I didn’t want to feel left out. Physically or mentally and behaviour wise. My body image issues began from there. Now I’m comfortable with my body. I’m so glad. That transition is so important.
Did you beat anyone after you got tough?
Fatima I have hit so many people. Jo bhi merko chherta tha. My friends will tell you hundreds of stories of me running behind people who’ve been on bikes, screaming, ‘ki tune chua kaise? Kutte!’
Sanya I was in a girl’s college and so many guys would just wait outside and misbehave. And we would either hit somebody or thappar maar diya. When I was really small, my sister and I were walking outside the house. And this guy came and he eve teased my sister. Uski haalat kharab kar di maine. He wasn’t expecting it at all.
Have you always been really tough?
Sanya Not tough looking. But yes. I have. Fatima This has happened to me once. I was walking on the road and this guy in a car was masturbating. He blew the horn so I looked inside. I went numb. I didn’t know what to do. I wanted to look for someone to help me and take me to a safe place. I was scarred for a while. So both things happen. Sometimes I react, sometimes I don’t.
Fatima Actually you know when people see
us they don’t expect us to look like this. They see us and they’re surprised. Because we looked very huge in the film. We were bigger. People see us and think ‘isse toh badi hogi life mein’. Sanya Being an actor, we’ll play different roles in different films. Like Aamir Khan after PK was PK. After Ghajini he was Ghajini. So, I guess it’s the same for us. After Dangal, we are Geeta and Babita. I think we did our job well.
So what is your idea of femininity?
Fatima I don’t relate to that word. Nothing comes up in my mind. I’ve always grown up around boys and yet had my identity. I used to be a tomboy; would wear my brother’s clothes and I would sit with my legs apart. When I started wearing girly clothes...
Sanya And you still sit like that by the way.
Yes, but does that really decide what is feminine and what is not?
Fatima No. But when you wear a skirt, your underwear will show if you sit with your legs apart.
Sanya Yes, but so what? Everybody wears an underwear.
Fatima I don’t want to show my underwear to the world. My underwear is for me.
So we find it easy to use the tomboy label, but difficult to identify what’s feminine?
Sanya For me, sometimes I wear dresses and sometimes I wear loose t-shirts and pants. They’re both feminine.
Have you ever dealt with people bothering you about bra straps showing?
Fatima When I was in college, the trend was to wear spaghetti tops and show nice lacy colourful bra straps. Actually once in one of my relationships, the guy came up to me and said “dikhraha hai”. I said, “dikh raha hai toh dikh raha hai, tera kya jar raha hai?”
Did you dump him?
Fatima He dumped me. Sanya Oh no! Fatima But not because of the strap.
Sanya One of my exes had a problem with me wearing a sari. Obviously, I wore it anyway. People think women will wear shorts and others will have a problem, but people have a problem with saris as well. So pehnoon kya? It’s better not to listen to any of these people.
What is your take on marriage as an institution?
Sanya In India, there’s a thing that you have to get married and you have to have children at a certain age. Aur main nahi karne wali hoon. I believe in monogamy, but I don’t have to take saat phere and sign a paper to show the world that I’m with someone. It’s a waste of money. It’s just a big party. Take that money and travel.
Fatima I do not believe in it. In marriages, people spend so much time together. After a point, they’re not lovers. They’re friends. Just companions. Love fades away. And the same way, sometimes with just friends, you end up being lovers.
Do you like babies?
Fatima I like them. From afar.
Do you have any pressure from home about marriage and children?
Sanya Never! Fatima No, never. In fact, I think my mom may have mentioned it once. My dad said, baat mat karo mujhse. Abhi iska time hai career banana ka, tum kaisi baatein kar rahi ho iss ghar mein? Sanya My mother is the coolest mother on earth. Fatima She’s very cool Sanya She’s the typical Punjabi looking mother. Not modern looking. But super ‘chill’ in life. She knows everything about fashion, she’s so up-to-date. She gets me the coolest clothes. You’ll never be able to tell that she would buy me such clothes. She gets me sexy dresses.
Speaking of powerful women, you met Geeta and Babita. What was that like?
Sanya We went for Geeta’s wedding. There were so many people there in Haryana. There was police and bodyguards all protecting Aamir sir. Sakshi maam and I got left behind. Suddenly, all these girls came together. They were protecting me and Sakshi maam. They were all decked up. They looked so pretty. With rock solid muscles. And there’s a dwar on their village and it says—Geeta Babita, Vinesh, Ritu, in sab ke gaon mein aap ka swagat hai. It’s amazing.
It must have been exciting?
Sanya Yes! And this is in Haryana. Haryana mein ladkiyaan kam hai people say, but things are changing. They are changing them. It’s helping. It’ll take time, but it will change.
Bollywood is sexist. Do you think it needs to change? Why are 50-year-old men acting with 20-year-old women?
Fatima People think once an actor gets married and has children, her career is over. But that’s changing. Look at Kareena Kapoor. You can see her doing a film with younger boys. Ki and Ka, Udta Punjab. If you see now, Alia is running the show. People go to watch a film for her, not the actor.
Sanya Or for Kangana, or Deepika. Or Priyanka.
Fatima Look what PC has achieved, no man in Bollywood has achieved that. It’s happening. We also shouldn’t be caught up. Allow the change.
Item numbers?
Fatima I would want to do ‘Sheila ki jawaani’. I’d love to dance like that. Women shouldn’t be scared to be sexy. If you’re enjoying it, do it. Why are item numbers considered as “oh, shit” and not something liberating? If an item number is interesting for me, I will do it.
I don’t relate to the word feminine. Nothing comes to my mind. I’ve always grown up around boys and yet had my identity. Fatima Sana Shaikh