Feminism is… finding the power within
AKANKSHA SEDA, 31, CREATIVE DIRECTOR, BLUSH, MUMBAI
What is the definition of feminism for me? I’ll start with what it is not.
Feminism is not a fixed concept. There isn’t one kind of feminist. A feminist is the woman who is a homemaker but makes sure she finds an hour for herself. A feminist is a serial monogamist in the city who shaves her legs, loves being in a relationship but doesn’t want to settle down. You can’t generalise feminism; it’s so personal, so complex. Feminism is not equality. Equal rights yes, but not ‘equality.’ Men and women were born different, from their minds to their bodies and to the biological functions they were wired to perform. I menstruate every month, men don’t. I make a child for nine months and my body changes forever, men don’t. And men go through things that women don’t. So our life decisions and experiences are going to be different. Let’s stop fighting for the same space and make the focus more about respecting those differences. Feminism is not a fight. Our mothers, foremothers and the bra-burning feminists of yore, they fought the hard fight for equal rights. They enabled me to have the liberation I enjoy today, they inspired me to have this voice. But the continuing assumption that we have an enemy to fight is not constructive to the movement today.
So what is it? It is the understanding that ‘the power is within me’. Turn the gaze inward, not outward. Ask yourself, “what do I allow, what do I choose, what are absolute ‘no no’s’ at work, or at home, or with my father/boyfriend/boss? What do I permit and what do I not?” When you realise that your choices, your decisions, your mind, body, spirit is yours, then there is no battle that needs to be won. You’ve won the war within yourself. You can go watch a movie by yourself, you’re happy being single, you can hammer in a nail on a wall by yourself. And no, you’re not lonely or depressed or a closet homosexual (as is assumed) if you choose yourself over others. It’s being at peace with what you are, not what you are not. It’s knowing, ‘I am enough.’ That’s what underlies all the work we produce at Blush, we don’t want to hate the world, we want to turn the lens onto ourselves.